Chapter 19: Fake it 'till you break it:

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~Chapter Song: Moments Like This, The Afters~


Cameron Diaz was about to kiss me.

And... the microphone buzzed through the speaker breaking the little bubble we were in.

"Beer bong.", someone very drunk yelled through the mic.

The 'What am I doing?' question passed through me. It was Cameron.

We moved at the same pace, to the place everyone was gathered.

I might not have been to many parties, but beer bong? That I knew damn well how to play.

"Well,", Christine yelled by now completely drunk, "Make duos everyone, we are playing beer pong."

Cameron turned to me, "Let's win this thing.".

I told myself that I accepted his offer because I knew he was good a beer bong and not because I enjoyed his company. Not because I seem to love the version of myself, I was when with him.

We stood at one side of the ping pong, Ben and Mark on the other.

"Ready to eat our dust?", Ben asked.

"You wish.", I snorted and threw the first ball finding the cup that was at the beginning of the triangle.

Ben drank the whole cup and threw one, or at least tried to. It landed on the head of a guy behind us, who left a cry of pain.

Cameron and I choked a laugh while he threw our second round, finding the cup in the center.

Mark and Ben exchanged a look that meant "We are fucked."

And they truly were.

Fourteen minutes, five cups of beer for me and six for Cameron later, we had six cups left on our side. Ben and Mark only had one, and it was my turn to shoot.

"Listen to me.", Cameron told me -slightly drunk- like he was training me for the Olympics, "You got this, okay? It's just one last cup. Let's win this.", he patted my hair, and if I wasn't as light-headed as I was, I would get mad, from him treating me like a dog, but I had too much beer to get mad. He had more than me, but he seemed to be in a better condition. I guess being a giant had something to help with that.

I nodded and threw the ball. It touched the wall of the cup, bounced to the other wall, and landed in the beer.

I jumped up and down, cheering, and somehow ended up in Cameron's arms. I tried to pull away as soon as I realized, but he didn't let go.

Soon, the crowd was cheering, "Kiss. Kiss. Kiss.", over and over again, and if I hadn't seen Christine go to the restroom, a while ago, I would think she started it.

I looked at Cameron. Now what? We were a 'couple'. 'Dating'. How were we supposed to avoid that?

I knew I shouldn't. I knew that growing closer to Cameron would end up being a mistake, we would both regret it.

"Don't panic.", Cameron whispered and leaned closer to me.

The kiss was soft, his lips barely touching mine, but I felt him everywhere.

Maybe people were cheering, maybe they didn't even pay attention. I wasn't sure.

That thumb that traced a line across my jaw put my skin on fire, and the hand squeezing my waist brought butterflies in my stomach. I wrapped my arms around his neck, trying to cut some of the distance between us, while he pulled me even closer. I felt so alive.

I couldn't even think normally. All I could think was Cameron.

All I wanted to do was freeze time. Slow time, so I could capture the moment.

I don't know if it was two seconds, or two minutes later, but we parted.

And the look on Cameron's face destroyed the bubble we were in.

Kissing your fake boyfriend was not something that was supposed to happen. Pretend was what we had said. Pretend we don't hate each other. Pretend to be in love. And yet at that kiss... I'm not sure where the pretend ended and the real began. The only thing I did know was that at some point in this same, I stopped needing to pretend. I started living through a relationship that was a lie. We were in too deep. Way over ourselves, to be thinking nothing like that would have happened.

I needed to be alone. And Christine. I needed to talk to my best friend even if it meant telling her the truth. So, I ran. I didn't even know where I was going, I just opened the first unlocked door of the long hallway.

Christine was there. Sitting. On some dude's lap. Kissing him.

He had on black clothes and a red and black mask that was covering his eyes. Christine mumbled an "Oh my God" and stood up, in a way that proved she felt guilty for some reason.

"I'm sorry.", I said and closed the door. That was going to be a very interesting conversation tomorrow. All I wanted, for now, was to go home and talk to Harry since he wasn't... occupied. I texted my dad, to come and get me and waited outside for him. He came fifteen minutes later.

"Hey.", he said as I got in the car. "Wasn't Cameron going to drive you home? I thought he was coming."

"Yeah, but he left early." He looked at me with disbelief and pointed to something outside the window.

"Isn't that his car?", there it was the parked blue car, right in front of us.

"Dad, can you please drive?" I didn't want to lie to him too. It felt like I was lying to everyone I knew. To Christine and Ben. Even to Cameron.

He nodded and started the car.

"We never thank you, for not making a big deal out of Cameron coming to your school.", the sound of his name gave me a sudden urge to smile, even with the night's events, "We know it wasn't what you wanted to happen, but we are glad it worked out. Lisa" -Cameron's mum- "said Cameron looks a lot happier than at his other school. Less stressed. She feels it was a good decision."

"Wait, what do you mean decision? Cameron told me it was because his old school doesn't have the combination of lessons he wanted." Did he lie to me for the reason he came to my school?

"I thought he told you. Cameron had a panic attack in his other school before the exams, and he needed to change environments. His mum thought it would be a good idea for him to be in the same school with someone he knew."

My jaw dropped a bit.

The leg bouncing thing. How he always touched his clock's strap when every time he had to answer something in class. How stressed he was for that test a week ago. 'I'm okay, as long as I have you here.', he had said to me before.

I had noticed these signs but never put the pieces together. You can never truly know how someone feels unless they tell you. And even then you can never be sure.

~~~

A/N:

I couldn't end it without a kiss. Hope you liked it!

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