Lies - Criminal Minds || Spencer Reid Fanfiction

2. Memories

"No matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories." ~ Haruki Murakami

"The town was paper, but the memories were not." ~ John Green

The Daughter

"Boss... Boss...? Boss!" I blinked out of my reverie and up at Carter who was standing in my doorway.

"You okay?" She asked and I cleared my throat, sitting up straighter in my chair and popping my knuckles habitually.

"S-sorry," I stuttered, scratching the back of my neck. "Everything alright?" I asked self-consciously, trying to gather my thoughts from where they'd been moments previous.

"I dunno, you tell me, briefing was meant to start ten minutes ago." I rapidly glanced at the clock on the wall before jumping to my feet.

"Oh my God!" I leapt to my feet. "I think I need to restart the day!" I gushed, gathering my tablet and phone into my hands.

"It's okay..." She said warily, watching me as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Wait, back up," She said, putting a light hand against my chest as I approached her. She narrowed her eyes as she looked at me.

"You have a man!" She guessed, a grin splashing across her face.

Immediately my cheeks heated red and she laughed. "You do don't you! That's why you're all distracted!"

I shook my head, licking my lips as she laughed and sanded her hands mumbling about how great this was.

"I do not have a man, Carter," I said matter-of-factly, trying to look her in the eye and bring her back to reality. "Honestly," I said, eventually catching her eye. "There's no man."

"Well a woman then!" She gushed and I rolled my eyes at her, shaking my head.

"There is no other half in my life, I can promise you that much." I cleared my throat and led the way to the conference room.

"Now c'mon, we better get to briefing before the whole town of Georgia is murdered."

I was thankful to have Carter off my back on the whole 'man' front. But she wasn't all that far off.

I suppose that should've made me proud; realising first-hand that her profiling was improving so much she could tell there was something love related that was clearly bothering me.

Ever since the case with my old team (and Spencer) I'd been distracted and thoughtful and more-or-less living in my past.

Since moving to New York I'd so easily shut off my old life; completely withdrawn myself from everything relating to my relationship with Reid and everything we'd had together.

It hadn't been easy; but Beth and my dad had really supported me; and so had Penelope whenever we'd met up for lunch or coffee.

But now... Now that I'd been back to the BAU and now that I'd seen him again... Seen him with his new girlfriend...

All of those feelings and memories had come crashing back. It made me aware of how much I was missing my old life.

When I'd originally moved to Virginia from New York; I hadn't missed my old life once; I was too thankful to be getting rid of Melanie Joyner and the life she'd led to be worrying about old memories.

I was simply thankful that I wasn't on a Terrorist's 'Most Wanted' list. But now there were real things; real memories to miss. And now it hurt.

Thankfully my team knew something wasn't quite right and this past week they'd really stepped up to the plate to help out on cases I hadn't exactly been all-that-there for.