Lies - Criminal Minds || Spencer Reid Fanfiction

21. Wondrous

"But if thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought." ~ George Orwell

The Lover

For a while, I sat there. In my car. Staring up at the building in front of me; willing myself to either go in or go home. I didn't know what to do. Didn't know what I wanted to do either.

My conscience kicked in when I was halfway across the parking lot towards the entrance and that's when I knew it wasn't a matter of wanting to at all; it was a matter of needing to.

I approached the front reception, nodding my head and smiling at the receptionist awkwardly before clearing my throat and taking a deep breath.

"I-I'm Spencer Reid. I'm here to see my mom... Uh, Diana Reid." The receptionist grinned brightly and her eyes sparkled as she flagged a nearby nurse.

"Certainly Doctor Reid, Nurse Elena will take you to her." I wondered how the receptionist knew I was a Doctor and smirked as I heard Melanie's voice in my head pointing out the fact that my choice of clothing will always give way to the fact that I'm a Doctor.

"Doctor Reid how nice to see you," The nurse, Elena, greeted me with a warm smile. "Your mother has been asking after you for a while now. But she understands your work is very demanding."

"Did she receive my letters?" I asked and Elena nodded. "And my messages... From... From the last times?" Elena nodded again and I sighed guiltily.

I'd lost count of the number of times I'd driven all the way here before pausing by the front reception and losing my bottle.

I loved my mom. But so many times I'd had to tell her about Melanie, and so many times I'd watched her heart break. Eventually, I just couldn't do it anymore.

"She's having a good day today, Doctor. We're trying to keep it that way. It's been a long time since." I sighed sadly at this news before nodding my head and approaching my mom sat in front of the window in a high-backed chair; engrossed in a book.

"Hello, mom." I announced my presence beside her and she looked up, blinking slowly as though she was hallucinating.

"Spencer?" She questioned in surprise, reaching up to remove her reading glasses which she hadn't had to use in such a long time.

"My God," She half-gasped. "Look at you," She said in a displeased tone. "You're practically skin and bone! You've aged, Spencer, what's happened?" I smiled at her concern and took to the seat opposite her.

"I'm fine, mom, really," I insisted. "I'm just working hard."

"Working hard, that's all you ever do is work hard. Work hard at what, Spencer? At catching criminals? Or breaking the hearts of loved ones?"

I dipped my head. 

Of course. Now she remembered.

"It's not just Melanie you don't see anymore, it's me now too. I mean really, Spencer, how long were you going to leave it? Did you really think I wouldn't know you stood there, too scared to come in to see me?"

"I didn't want to upset you." I said in a weak voice and she reached forward, covering my hands with one of her frail own.

"I am your mother, Spencer," She said in a stern tone that made me look up at her. "A mother always protects her children, no matter what, and if that means taking emotion and turmoil on the chin in order to put on a brave face to keep their children at peace, then so be it."

"Mom, you were heartbroken about what happened-"

"Yes," She nodded, withdrawing her hand to sit back against her chair. "But so were you. Eventually, I would've come to see that and I would've protected you, as all mothers should do, Spencer. Just like Melanie done for the eight months that she carried your child,"