Mr. Sadistic

38 || Always.

I can hear the frantic calls between my teammates, I'm not sure the quality of the helmet camera lens will show the harnesses me and my team had come down on.

I look down at my watch with two seconds left and I start sprinting, calculating the distance between me and the edge and matching my speed. "Dex what the fuck are you doing!?" Ghost says.

I feel the slight curb surrounding the roof under my boot without slowing my speed. "Trust me" I say as I bend my knees and push myself off with every little last bit of strength I can muster. 

The explosion is heard before I could feel it, going off exactly as I jump. I feel a burning, forceful pressure slam into my back, pain washing through me but nonetheless I am forced forwards in the air due to the sheer strength of impact.

I am anything but graceful even without gravity, but my eyes set on the hanging ropes of the harnesses. They too are impacted by the air and swing away from me as I start to fall, once again in gravity's grip. 

I watch as I fall towards the ends of the ropes, it'll kill me on impact. The fear is unmatched to anything I've felt before.

This is where I die, I watch as I pass the ends of the ropes, out of reach.

I close my eyes not wanting to see, I pray that its instant. With the last thing in my control heading towards my inescapable death I turn my back to the floor. This was not how I thought I'd die, no. 

I wasn't twenty-four and I wasn't married or old, but I'd done the job. I set the fire and successfully completed the mission with my team.

It's only been seconds but it feels like eternity.

"It's been fun serving alongside you all" I say, not even sure if they can hear me with all the wind. My mind fixates on everything I never achieved, and I feel at peace despite myself. 

Tucked away in the safe enclosure of my brain I reminisce and regret things I never did or said. I guess I would go out, not in a blaze of glory but falling and accepting. There would be no future, no old lady time, no children and no marriage for me. 

But at least for them.

"Dex look at me" Keegans voice cuts through my thoughts. "Dex open your fucking eyes" he grunts, his voice strained and demanding, nothing I'd ever heard him sound like.

I open my eyes; having forgotten they were shut. 

His hand. 

His outstretched desperately trying to reach me.

I don't hesitate to reach my own hand out. Stretching my fingertips till it pains my muscles. I see his determined eyes, narrowed and focused but filled with doubt and fear, desperation in his furrowed eyebrows. 

The way his pupils dilate tells me the ground is not far from me. "I'm not going to reach her, the harness is coming to an end" he says, and I hear him in the comms.  

I smile at him; I want him to know that it's okay. That at least he tried, and I couldn't be more thankful, our fingertips brush, in no way allowing a grasp on each other which only tortures us both. 

He lets out a frustrated grunt and I can tell the rope will stop him soon and while he hovers, I will fall. "It's okay!" I shout to him, and he finally lifts his eyes to mine away from my hand.

I smile for him, although. I'm scared too. "It's okay Keegs!" I call letting my outstretched arm relax. 

I feel the tears in my eyes as my hair whiplashes across my face, I can't be far now. He looks afraid, defeated like he's already lost me. 

The building in the corner of my eye passes by in the many levels. I watch in a world of slow-mo as Keegans harness stops abruptly, halting his decent with a rough jolt and he stays there while I fall.

His hand remains outstretched, a second doesn't pass so quickly anymore. He was so close and so far. 

"Keegan, come in, copy?" Ghosts voice comes through comms.

"Copy" Keegan is quick to reply but his voice sounds void of emotion. I am a mere spectator listening in on the exchange. 

"Do you trust me?" Ghost speaks, his voice a husky calm. 

"Always"