Advising

Nihilister - 7 (Post-April Fools)

After spending a day being a pathological liar for fun, I return to my room, resting.

Buzz Buzz!

Before I jump into my comfy bed, the unexpected noise from the phone jolts me back up. I read the messages......sent by Nihilister???

*BlaBla Chat Opened*

Nihilister: Hey, I saw your message.

Commander: ?

Nihilister: Hot and Heavy, huh. Telling that to everyone, I've gotta say that's quite bold of you. About time!

Commander: About time?

Nihilister: I'd just finished a mission for Eden. On my way to the Outpost.

Commander: Wait, what about mission report?

Nihilister: Later.

Commander: Is that really okay?

Nihilister: Don't worry about trivia stuff. That's my problem to handle. Now, I've got in me a priority.

Commander: Uhh...what priority?

Nihilister: Hah! Look at you, all pretending. You know what I'm saying.

Commander: Hot and Heavy?

Nihilister: Yeah, Hot and Heavy. Since you decided to offer, I'm going to make full use of it.

Commander: Ah, okay. You want it crispy or creamy?

Nihilister: ?!! Wait a minute, there're options for this? It was usually straightforward.

Commander: This Hot and Heavy can go both way. Pick one.

Nihilister: What's the point?

Commander: To make things look fresh.

Nihilister: Huh. Alright, I like it creamy.

Commander: Raw or with salt?

Nihilister: Salt? Why on Earth would you want to add salt into this? It's not like I'm going to eat it literally. All I need is to swallow.

Commander: Makes sense, no salt then.

Nihilister: Are we on the same page?

Commander: Definitely.

Nihilister: Are you sure about that? Cuz it sounds like you're twisting my words.

Commander: Not at all. You want it creamy, raw and easy to swallow. You've got it!

Nihilister: ...Human, you're up to something.

Commander: Also! Do you want gravy on the side?

Nihilister: Guess that's that. I'll play along. Let's see what you've got for me.

Commander: Look forward to it.

Nihilister: Right! Just a head up, my appetite is big today, be sure not to disappoint me.

Commander: A big pot then.

Nihilister: Wow. Aren't you funny? You're really going to offer me food on a silver platter?

Commander: Yeah. Hot and Heavy.

Nihilister: Is that so? You and I better be on the same page. If this turns out to be something else, I. Will. Get. Intensely Steamy.

I stare at her text, sweating a little. I'm playing with fire. Better to backpedal now before it's too late.

Commander: Actually...it's roasted mashed potatoes. I'm cooking!

Nihilister: ............

Commander: Nihilister? You there? Nihilister?!

Nihilister: ............

Commander: Happy April Fools' Day!!

She's not reading the messages......uh-oh.

*BlaBla Chat Ended*

For a while, I waited and she hasn't read or replied. Why do I get the feeling the prank's gone wrong?

I check the clock. It's gone past twelve at midnight...no way! I quickly grab my phone, jump off the bed and make a beeline to the door. I have to get away from here, FAST!

Nihilister: Where do you think you're going?

She's standing right on the other side. A grin on a her face as our eyes make contact. She's already here?!!!

Nihilister: Heheh! I like that look on your face. Surprise, surprise~. A prank won't be a prank unless I get to hear April Fools from you. But guess what, I haven't and that was already yesterday. Now I get to take your words for it.

Commander: ...Happy Post-April Fools' Day??

Nihilister: *Shaking her head* Ah-uh.

Nihilister has bended the rule of April Fools' Day. Nothing he says will go through her, his words which started as prank now becomes true.

Commander: This is so not fair.

Nihilister: Oh. This is on you, you know. You don't ignite a fire just to play with it. Enough of this, I need a shower and my Hot, Heavy stuff. Now come here.

Nihilister pulls me into the shower with her. By my own prank, I'm reaping what I sowed.