Saved Me

✨ c h a p t e r t w e n t y s i x ✨

Jay offered to let me stay with him and I accepted. I didn't want to acknowledge the emptiness inside my home. After they had passed away, I slept over at my friends' houses. I never slept in my own home. One of the main reasons was that I couldn't possibly pay the bills. My aunt took over the bills and cut off most of the things I didn't need when I wasn't around. The only thing that she kept on when I was around was the electricity and heating when necessary.

The moment I arrived at Jay's house, his parents both pulled me into a tight hug, gushing about how much they've missed me. They asked me so many questions that Jay had to pull me away. We went into his room and laid on his bed together. There was nothing sexual about it. We were just two friends, hell, we were more like siblings. Jay was the one of the very few friends I had that let me stay with him. His family took me in as if I was one of them.

"Your phone keeps vibrating," he murmured. I sighed heavily, grabbing it. I scrolled through my notifications, a weird feeling settling into my stomach. I had so many notifications, it felt weird. As stupid as it sounds, seeing the number of missed calls and text messages made me feel wanted. Most of them were from Roman, no doubt. I hesitated, not sure whether I should call him or call my aunt or turn my phone off. "Any day now Abbs."

"What do I do?"

"What do you think you should do?"

I got up from his bed and made my way into the guest room. I sat down on the table, tucking my feet underneath me as I dialed the number.

"Abigail!" my aunt greeted.

"I'm so sorry," I murmured. She sighed; I could picture her rubbing her forehead.

"I know why honey," she replied. "Just please, come home." Home.

"I...I'm not ready. I just want to stay with Jay's family for a bit."

She was silent for a moment before she sighed softly. "Okay. Okay. You can stay, but please honey, come home soon."

"I will Aunty." She was silent for a moment.

"Roman misses you a lot." I swallowed inaudibly as my heart clenched. I missed him so much. "At least call him Abby."

"I will," I murmured, taking a deep breath.

After we hung up, I contemplated whether or not I should call him now. My fingers automatically dialed his number since it was practically engraved in my head. My thumb hesitated over the call button for a few seconds.

Before I could make a decision, my phone began ringing. I stared at it for a few seconds. By the time I made my decision, the phone stopped ringing. I sighed softly, nibbling on my lower lip.

"Knock knock," Jay said, stepping in. I gave him a weak smile. He wrapped his arm around my waist as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"What happened?" he asked.

"She's okay with me staying for a while."

"Did you talk to Roman?" I shook my head. He sighed. "Do you want to get your mind off of him?"

"Is it bad that I sort of do?"

"No, not at all."

"Then yeah."

"Good, because there's someone here to see you."

"Surprise!" I nearly fell off the bed as the crazy brunette jumped on top of us. I couldn't help but laugh at my other best friend, Annalise Williamson. "You bitch! How dare you ditch me and disappear off the face of the earth?! What kind of roomie-to-be are you?!" Annalise and I were going to the same college and dorming together.

"Alright crazy, get off her before you break her," Jay said, pulling her off of me. I chuckled, feeling more like myself than I did earlier. She hugged me tightly.

"I missed you so much," she mumbled, sniffling softly. I bit down on my lip from crying.

"I missed you too Lise," I replied, hugging her back just as tight.

"I missed you too Jay," Jay said as he wrapped his arms around us both in a group hug. We laughed, pulling back.

"Let's all go out to eat," Annalise said. I noticed how she subconsciously moved towards Jay, almost as if he was a magnet and she was a piece of iron. Like her, Jay moved to stand closer to her, as if leaving any space between them would cause them to combust.

"Sure, and on the way there you guys can tell me what's going on between you two," I said, grinning at both of them as I walked past their surprised faces.

A/N: so today is World Mental Health Day and I'd just really like to touch upon this quickly.

Mental illnesses are not something that goes away. It takes a whole lot of time and effort.

You cannot cure depression by smiling, going outside, or by thinking about the fact that people have it worse. That is the absolute worst thing you can say to a person who is dealing with depression. That's EXACTLY like saying you can't be happy because other people have it better. You cannot cure anxiety by "talking to more people." That doesn't do shit. Drinking tea isn't going to make you feel better.

If someone comes to you because they are having mental problems, do not tell them to get over it. Do not be an asshole. Be there for them. If they come to you, then help them. They didn't come to you so you can be an asshole. They came to you because they felt that they could talk to you. It's very hard for some people to open up to others.

Also, mental health is just as, if not more, important than physical health so don't you dare put someone down because they have depression, anxiety, etc.

Also (x2), I am always here for absolutely anyone. I've dealt with depression and anxiety for a long time. I know how you feel. I've been through quite a few traumatic experiences. Just remember that I love you. My private messages are always open to anyone. I mean it.

stay strong xo