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LISTENING TO MY VINYL WHILE WRITING THESE STORIES MAKE IT SOME MUCH MORE BETTER TO WRITE :)) AHA

TWO UPDATES AINT YOU LUCKY ;)


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APRIL

When I woke up I looked to my side and saw William still sleeping but instead of the feeling of adoration I normally would have looking at him, I felt nothing. That was my first sign that I was the girl I was over six years ago. The one who didn't care or feel anything towards anyone. The one who had a her mind set on one thing and that was it. Being this girl was good in one sense, that I could protect William better but in another I was scared behind this girl. I was scared that no one would be able to bring me back after all this is over.

I slowly got up but with my bad luck William woke up. Rubbing his eyes like always making me roll my eyes, which was something I never did at my son. I always found everything he done cute. This was the second sign for me.

"Mummy?"

"Yes?" I said bluntly.

Talking bluntly and with no emotion was the third sign.

"What are we doing today?" He asked getting up like I was.

"I don't know" I muttered looking through my suitcase for something to wear today.

"I want to do something exciting. Something outside. I haven't been outside for a couple of days. I mean the back garden but that isn't out, outside. I want to go outside and do something fu-"

"William will you shut up for one second!" I shouted annoyed.

Sign four. I never shouted at my son for no reason, plus his rambling use to be my favourite thing.

After the words came out of my mouth, nothing else was said. I didn't hear anything from behind me apart from a couple of sniffles. I turned round and saw him clenching his fist. He stared wide like he was trying to stop the tears from falling but Unfortunely he was failing. Tears fell and I didn't feel sad or bad. God I hated this me sometimes. He choked when he tried to speak but stopped himself.

"Will-"

"What's going on here?"

I looked away from William and towards the door. Anne stood there was the boys and Gemma standing behind her. They must've all heard me.

Anne looked at me and then at William who was silently crying a metre away from me.

"Come on William, lets go get some breakfast!" Anne cheered taking the boy away from me, which I silently thanked her for. Gemma followed her making William laugh with funny faces on the way down the stairs.

I would've smiled at the interaction if I weren't this me from over six years ago.

I turned back to my suitcase, chucking things to the floor until I found something I wanted to wear.

"What was that on about?" I heard a voice speak from the door way, reminding me that the boys hadn't left yet.

"He was annoying me." I said bluntly without looking at who was speaking.

"Your own son was annoying you?"

That sentence made me look at the voice of the person who was speaking. Harry.

"Son? Like you would know anything about that right? I mean you don't want to even be apart of his life, at least I'm trying." I smirked at him as I saw his face drop, that's when I slammed the door in their faces.

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