First Love

Chapter 31

ANNABELLE’S POINT OF VIEW

One month left. That’s all I had left of my tour with One Direction. I had to admit, the first few days were a little rocky, but I was having a blast. There wasn’t a moment that went by when I wasn’t thinking about how much longer I wanted this to last.

It was almost over, though. I stared at the off-white wall of the hotel room I was sitting in. The floor was off-white, too. The bed and furniture all cream with accents of gold. I was so tired of seeing the same colors over and over again. I was still happy we got to stay in a hotel room, though. We had three days here, two now, before we headed off for the next stop. At first I had tried to keep track of where we were going and when, but I had long since given up. There were too many places and dates and times, my head just couldn’t keep all of that information. A knock on the, get this, off-white door snapped me out of my thoughts.

I jumped up, walking to the door. I opened it up to my roommate, Zayn. “You know you don’t have to knock, right?” I joked, moving out of the way so he could walk in.

“Just being safe!” He defended himself, causing us both to double over in laughter.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” I said once I had finally regained composure. I laid back down on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I thought back to the first night on the tour bus, when Zayn had offered to sleep on the couch so I would be more comfortable. There was an outrageous storm raging outside the window, so I was definitely not sleeping by myself. That was the second time Zayn and I had slept together, but the first time I wasn’t having a fit. We had shared a room ever since.

I had to admit it was nice, having him around. He was really level-headed, always thinking things through logically and giving me an honest opinion. It meant a lot, and was helpful in sticky situations.

Like Hannah. She was definitely a sticky situation. Niall and her are together, and as much as I hate to admit it, I’m happy he’s happy. I know he’ll always hold a special place in my heart. Not saying I like the idea, but I’ve come to accept it. Niall flew Hannah out to see us during our first small break, during week two. We were in a town in England somewhere, and staying there for three days. I guess he hadn’t told anyone, because everyone was as shocked as I was. Being the baby I was, I burst into tears when I saw her. I wasn’t ready for that yet.

She obviously was, though. Zayn took me to our room, where he soothed me until my sobs became quiet hiccups. He left to go get pizza, and Hannah came over. I was hoping for reconciliation. I didn’t want to hate her, even if I wasn’t ever going to just forgive and forget, I was ready to be civil. Hannah came in, throwing every accusation possible at me.

I hurt him.

He deserved so much better.

Zayn only pities me.

She hated me.

The world hated me.

I was an ugly bitch.

Die in a hole.

The insults got increasingly worse, until Zayn stepped in, pizza in hand. Hannah didn’t know he had a key, and was genuinely shocked when she heard the door slam behind her. Zayn got her out, but, needless to say, that was a really bad night for me. I couldn’t help but think it was all true, you know? It was bad, bad enough that I almost went back to cutting, but the scars remained scars. I know I have only Zayn to thank for that. He was nothing but helpful, all the time.

I couldn’t help but think about what he had said, that first night together. ‘If I’m going to win you over, I’m going to do it right.’ I’m not going to lie, he has wiggled his way into my heart in a way I’d never thought possible. Through so much heartache and despair, I feel that little glimmer of hope that is Zayn Malik.