Tell Me That You Love Me

Forgiveness

Hello Readers! Thank you for the 53K reads and votes! It's amazing! Sorry for the long wait, here's a new chapter. Enjoy!

➺

Lucy's POV

I recovered from my wounds quickly and everything was back to normal; except the tension between Natsu and I.

He was guilty, and I knew that. I want to tell him that, "It's okay, everything's fine." But somehow, I can't bring myself to. It's not that I didn't forgive him, it's just because I'm going through a tough phase right now. My emotional state is hanging by a thin thread, I don't feel like dealing with people.

I stared blankly at the board covered with mission lists. Nothing seems appealing. I let out a sigh as I headed to the bar and ordered a drink. Natsu sat on the stool beside me and ordered something before glancing at me meekly. "Um Lucy look, I, er, I'm sorry for everything I've done." I shook my head lightly and gave him a small smile, "It's alright, it wasn't your fault."

He stared at me before he sighed, "Thanks. And you should rest, you have bags under your eyes." He looked at me worriedly, just like how he did before he lost his memories. Without a word, I just stretched a smile at him.

He clenched his teeth tightly before he let out a frustration groan. Before I knew it, my body was lifted up into his arms, bridal style. "W-What are you doing?! Let me down!" I cried out. "No." He said stubbornly without sparing me a glance. Then, he took off at full speed. I let out a cry of horror and smacked his arm. "Natsu, slow down! Are you trying to kill me?" Natsu chuckled softly and spoke between his laughs, "You're still as dramatic as ever."

Still dramatic as ever huh.

"Anyway, I'm bringing you back to your apartment. You need some sleep." About damn time he told me where we were freaking flying off to.

I kept my silence and just laid on his chest. It was a bittersweet feeling. His scent still calms me, it made me feel safe and home-ly.

Natsu kicked my door open and laid me gently on my bed. He pulled the covers over me and sat on a stool near my bedside. "Sleep." He ordered. I nodded and shut my eyes.

I was tired, but somehow I can't seem fall asleep. I turned to the other side, facing the wall and tried to sleep, but it was no use.

Suddenly, I noticed a shadow hovering over me as my bed sinked slightly on the side.

It was Natsu.

I quickly shut my eyes and pretended to sleep. His fingertips drifted along my cheek as he let out a small sigh. He caressed my head gently and mumbled in a painful tone, "I'm sorry. I know you can't hear me that's why I'm saying this now."

I swallowed a lump in my throat and heard him sucking in a deep breath before he started talking softly. "Before I lost my memories, around the time when Lisanna returned from Edolas, I knew you were hanging out with Sting."

I winced slightly at the name of 'Lisanna'.

"I don't know why but I was jealous. Jealous that you were smiling and laughing around with him instead of me. It's stupid, I know. But I can't help it. A dumb idea popped in my head and I decided to use Lisanna to try and get back at you, but it just made me feel worst when I saw Sting and you at Ryuzetsu Land. The way he wrapped his arms around you when the both of you went down the slides was just too much for me - it was unbearable." He paused.

"So, I did the most ridiculous mistake that I could have ever done. I kissed Lisanna. It felt empty. Instead of affection, I was filled with hatred. My emotions took over my mind and all I could think about was how much I wanted you to feel what I felt. It was childish and immature of me, but somehow when it comes to you, I'm taken over by a crazy feeling which results to me doing rash actions." He paused again, as if contemplating what to say next.

"Anyway, when I followed the both of you to the Ferris Wheel, Lisanna spilled some weird gas into my mouth and that was when my memories were altered. All of my memories I had that involved you was replaced by Lisanna's existence. After that when I regained my memories, I saw you lying lifelessly in Sting's arms. My world was crashing down and everything was a blur. I was never so scared in my life. However, Sting saved you when I had no absolute damn about what to do. He exchanged his life for yours." Natsu let out a dry laugh and his voice cracked, "Ironic huh? The person I hated the most actually saved someone I held dear."

Soft sobs could be heard coming from him. Seeing him in this state kills me inside. A tear escaped from my eye as I bit my lip. "I'm so sorry Lucy. I really am. I killed someone you loved. I'm so fucking selfish-" Before Natsu could carry on, I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him as tightly as I could. Natsu was suffering all these time, he was torturing himself inside, killing himself slowly as he sinks into his guilt.

How could I not realise that? All I cared about was myself, throwing myself a pathetic pity-party and not noticing what Natsu was going through. He probably felt worst than I did in this, he thinks that all these were solely his fault, naming he himself a murderer.

"L-Lucy?" Natsu's voice quivered. I wrapped my arms tighter as I rest my head at the crook of his neck. "It's alright," I breathed, "No one wanted this to happen. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for making you feel this way." I kept repeating that over and over again, assuring Natsu and myself. He cried silently on my shoulder and pressed my body against his.

We clung to each other desperately, as if trying to fill in the flaws within ourselves. "Please stop torturing yourself, it's killing both me and you. So please..." I said almost inaudibly.

"You're already forgiven."