~Chapter Twenty Six ~

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Dear Diary,
   I went to see Stefan today. I'd been missing him so much and I thought maybe, just maybe, we could talk about everything's that's been going on. I thought maybe if we could get through that without any lies or deceit then maybe it would help make my decision about us easier, or at least give me a clear idea about what I wanted to do. And in a way, it did. Just not in the way I was expecting.
   When I got there I was greeted by a tall pretty blonde girl named Lexi. Now, Stefan's allowed to have friends over, that doesn't bother me. What bothered me was that she was wearing nothing besides a towel from Stefan's bathroom and when I asked about him, she said he was in the shower. She made no attempt to hide the fact that they were having a shower together and, as I said, my visit made everything clear.
   Stefan obviously did not feel the same way about me as I did of him. If he did, he would be thinking about me all the time and would never have dreamed of being with another, at least not yet anyway. Stefan's moved on, which is heartbreaking, but I guess it's for the best. I mean, weighing up the pros and cons of having him as a boyfriend was an exhausting process, and now he's decided for me. I will not go back to him. I will move on with my life and everything will be fine, just as his life is now. 

Jenna and Jeremy were out, so I got a little nervous when someone knocked on the door. To my knowledge both Bonnie and Caroline were headed to the Grill for Caroline's party, and since Stefan and I weren't really talking I honestly had no idea who it could be. 
   "Hey." I watched in surprise as Stefan stood at my door, dressed in his favourite brown leather jacket and a shirt I hadn't seen before. 
   "What are you doing here?" I asked, trying to control the butterflies which were flitting about in my stomach. A part of me was excited to see Stefan, as always, but why couldn't he just leave me alone? How was I supposed to decide whether to date him or not if he was always around?
   "Um, Lexi said that you came by and you, you seemed upset," he informed me, an underlying tone of concern and worry in his voice.
   "Right," I tilted my head, glaring up at what could be the most handsome guy I had ever laid eyes on. "The girl in the towel," I pointed out in a way which made it obvious why I was upset.
   "The towel?" He raised his eyebrows, shocked and surprised. Recognition crossed his face and he laughed, breathing a sigh of relief. "Oh, no, no, no. No, um, not like that, no, uh. She's not exactly a girl. Lexi's, um, just 350 years old," he raised his eyebrows, smiling with his lips pressed together.
   I gasped. "You mean she's a...?"
   "And she's my oldest friend," he clarified, nodding. "Nothing romantic. Ever."
   Relief washed over me, and a little bit of hope too. If Stefan was telling the truth, and that was a big if, then there was still a chance for us. He hadn't moved on and he hadn't forgotten about me. In fact, he cared enough to come and see me after hearing I was upset. 
   Stepping aside to let him in, I crossed my arms. "Oh," we shared a smile. "OK, well, she kept staring at me. It was weird."
   "Well, you know," he shrugged. "I've talked about you... A lot," he confessed sheepishly. Barely able to keep the smile off my face, I turned away and walked into the hall, out of the cold while Stefan closed the door. "So," he continued. "I guess she felt like she knew you."
   My heart pounded so hard in my chest I was convinced it would rip a hole through my ribs at any moment. Though occasionally I doubted Stefan's honestly, I believed him when he told me there was nothing going on between him and Lexi. He wouldn't tell Lexi about me if they were a couple. 
   "So," he shoved his hands in his pockets, casting his gaze upon the photographs which hung across the wall before fixing his eyes on me. "Why'd you come by?"
   "I... Uh..." Biting my lip, I leaned against the wall. "It was a mistake."
   Staring at the ground, I watched Stefan's feet shuffle closer until he was towering about me, his face leaning down to mine. "Eva," he cooed. "Talk to me."
   "I can't Stefan," I breathed. "I can't and that's the problem. I'm keeping all these secrets from everyone and I can't even tell my best friend. Do you know how hard that is?" I pleaded as he offered a sympathetic gaze. "Bonnie told me everything about her being a witch. She told me about her, her Grams, all of her ancestors. And do you know what? Her Grams warned her not to tell anybody about it but she told me. Why? Because I'm her best friend and she could never lie or keep secrets from me. And here I am, lying and keeping secrets, the very thing she said best friends don't do."
   Stefan lowered his head and pursed his lips, almost looking remorseful. "It's like I need to talk to someone," I continued. "But the only person I can talk to is, is you," I faltered. 
   "Eva," his tone turned serious. "I want you to know that I will always, be here for you. You can come to me about anything. OK?"
   Tears pricked my eyes but I quickly wiped the unwanted moisture away. "Well," I sniffed, re composing myself. "Thank you for coming by."
   Nodding slowly, Stefan turned and opened the door, prepared to leave when he twisted back to face me. "Hey, do you need a ride to the Grill tonight?"
   My eyes widened. "Are you going to Caroline's party?" I laughed while Stefan shook his head in defeat.
   "Lexi's dragging me," he chuckled.
   "Oh," I murmured. Stefan and Lexi may not have been dating, but they were obviously pretty close if she could convince Stefan Salvatore, the loner of Mystic Falls High School, to attend a party thrown by Caroline, the town's gossip girl and boy fanatic.
   "And," he breathed. "It's my birthday."
   "Oh," I blinked. "Really? Wow, um, happy birthday then," I smiled sadly, holding back from giving him a special birthday kiss and making this special day complete by changing my mind about our relationship. 
   "So," he interrupted my thoughts. "Do you want to come or..."
   "Actually, I think I'm gonna stay in tonight," I pursed my lips, nodding. "I have a lot on my mind and I don't think being pestered by Caroline is what I need right now. Besides, after everything that's happened since Halloween..."
   "Eva," he frowned deeply. "You're not staying home because you're scared to go out at night after what happened on Halloween, are you?" Avoiding eye contact, I shrugged. "Please, answer me honestly."
   My lips parted and I shook my head, laughing slightly in disbelief. "You want me to answer you honestly? I'm not the one whose word should be doubted, Stefan. You're the one who lied and kept secrets, not me."
   Stefan came back through the door, his eyebrows furrowed. "I did what I thought was right," he defended. "To protect you."
   "I don't need protecting, Stefan. Why can't you see that? I'm not some helpless little girl who can't do anything for herself."
   "That's not what I meant-"
   "If anything, you're the one I need protecting from."

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