[CLOSED] Helping Hands Critique Journal

40. #Aríya

DISCLAIMER:
I am not a professional writer, critic, and/or editor.  My evaluation and opinion will be based on observation, writing seminars that I've attended and/or personal research.  I might be harsh but my only intention is for you to improve your skills in writing, not to bash or discourage you. And last but very important, I am not a grammar geek.

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Author: Nh_Pzkznkzmtzm
Story: #Ariya
Critic: eiramana325
Critique Finished: June 24, 2020
Parts Read: 19 [Chapters 1-19]
Book Status: Ongoing
Genre: Mystery/Thriller

TITLE
[5%]

#Ariya: It's intriguing. Mapapaisip ka kung ano ang ibig sabihin nito lalo na't hindi ako Kapampangan.  It has a big connection in the story so, for me it's the perfect title.  Short and easy to remember.  

BOOK COVER
[3%]

Hmm? Pangatlong palit mo na ito ng book cover.  Sayang hindi ko na i-save iyong dalawang nauna.

Iyong una, parang new moon on black background.  Kitang-kita ang title.  Iyong author's name name sobrang liit.  Iyong pangalawa, mga mga items na nakalagay, maliit din ang title at author's name. Itong pangatlo, ang daming nakasulat na 'di ko agad mabasa kung hindi ko isu-zoom out ang image.

Honestly, in your three book covers, nothing is appealing to me. I suggest to ask someone to make a book cover for you.  Maraming magaling gumawa ng book cover.  I suggest a picture of a lady detective on dark background.  Use huge, readable and simple font for title.  Medium size for the Author's name on the bottom to look it more professional.

BLURB/
PROLOGUE/
INTRODUCTION/
DESCRIPTION/
TEASER
[9%]

BLURB

It could trigger curiosity especially the cliff at the end part, but it's better if you should name it. There are some typos, fragments, and grammatical errors.  I rephrased it.