Can I stay? (Gerard Way x Reader)

Sorry (55)

I pull my hands to my face in shock because I can't help it. I feel like all the air has been knocked out of my lungs and I'm left sitting there weak and breathless. I turn away from him and bury my head in my hands. This can't be happening. He is the whole reason I am here. He is the reason I wasn't kidnapped. He's the reason why I'm alive. But now I'm gonna loose him and there's nothing I can do about it. I feel tears flowing out of my face and I'm trying my best to be silent so Gerard doesn't see how upset I am but it's easier said than done.

"Oh thank god" Gerard says louder than anything else he has said today. Thank god. Thank god for what. My brain is confused and my heart still hurts and there's just too much going on. 

"Hey, hey hey oh my god are you okay" He realises that I'm upset and moves around so he is in front of me. He lifts my head up gently and moves my hands away from my face. The shock on his face is so sudden it's almost humerous except I am in no funny mood right now. 

"No, no don't be upset. Shit I'm sorry. It was a test I wanted to see how you would react. I thought you would be angry and i don't know slap me maybe. " he says gently pulling me towards him.

He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and giggles a bit which makes my lips curl into a tiny grin because he looks so damn cute when he giggles. Plus he has a super strange laugh which I actually really like. 

He leans in and kisses a tear that was running down my cheek. His lips are so soft and gentle and I can't explain the feeling when we connect. It's like the whole world stops and we are in our own little bubble with fireworks and electricity in the air around us. I imagine that this is what a phone is like when it's being charged, all alive and buzzing. 

"What do you mean it was a test" I mumble looking at the ground but he just moves even closer to me. I feel the hairs on my body stick up and my hands go clammy waiting for the answer but my heart is racing at 1000mph so it doesn't really compare.

"Y/N have I told you before? I don't think I have actually. Y/N I love you. God fucking dammit I love you and I don't want to have any break because I just like to be with you always. I know it sounds cheesy but under all this eyeliner and confidence is a guy that can't stop looking at this girl" Gerard says and his cheeks go bright red. He startes at me grinning like how toddlers smile when you get them a new toy or a bar of chocolate.

His hair flooping over one side of his face and his pale skin. Those damed hazel eyes and the little shadow just underneath them. His little crinckled cheeks when he smiles and his hands that fit around mine like a blanked. 

"Is that oka-" he begins to say but I lean in a kiss him before he can continue. I couldn't just sit there staring at him forever. Those lips are so soft and even though they may be chapped smetimes it just works. The whole earth stops when we kiss and he cups the side of my face with his hands which sends even more electric shocks down my body. The air is buzzing around us and I can't help but smile.

This guy loves me and I am here. I am so okay right now and it feels amazing. We lean in and kiss again and it's like something clicks. I don't understand how anyone can stop kissing because right now it seems impossible. Every kiss is better than the last and he is so strong but still calm and amazing. Wow I am rambling now but I can't help it. 

My life is one of extremes I am either dying and being kidnapped or I am over the moon and dancing in and amongst the stars. The happy moments are worth it and for a moment I am thankful to be alive. This is what living is for.

Now let's go and record some music!