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Chapter 33: I'm Done with Caring

Haley’s POV

“I knew that she was going to do, I tried to stop it but it was too late. I know you tried to do the same,” Samantha said, patting me on the back. She knew, she knew that I could have stopped it. My whole boy falls apart and let myself fall down.

“Haley!” I heard Tyler’s voice but I don’t look up. Samantha knew, I have no idea how, but she knows.  Then suddenly, I realize the other part that she said. ‘I tried to stop it but it was too late’. Samantha tried to stop it? Why, and more importantly how did she know about it?

I feel a hand appear on my shoulder, I look up to become face to face to Tyler. He looked concerned and confused.

“What did you do to her,” Tyler demanded to Samantha. I forgot that they were still dating a few short days ago, I could almost feel the tension and discomfort in the air.

“She didn’t do anything to me.” I muttered to Tyler. Then to Samantha, “He doesn’t know,” I whispered. She nodded.

“We can finish this conversation later, after you tell him,” She said pointing to Tyler. Tyler raised his eyebrow at me. I knew he was incredibly confused, and I was too. Someone else had a chance to stop her, in one way it was relief, I wasn’t the only one at fault, but in a different way she knew Kayla well enough that she was planning to do that. Samantha and Kayla had never spoken before, as far as I could tell. It was like Kayla was hiding Samantha from me. Kayla would never reveal that side of herself to anyone, she must have been really close with Samantha.

I didn’t want to explain to Tyler, why I was an awful person. I wanted him to think I could never do wrong.

“Could you please explain why you were talking to Samantha? What was she even doing here in the first place?” Tyler asked.

“I d-don’t know,” I stammered. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t tell him.

“Haley, please, a lot has happened this past week, just tell me,” He stated.

“I just wish it were that simple,” I said, I turned and walked to the hotel door. I put the key in and I could hear Tyler behind me. I opened up the door and quickly closed it. I knew it was harsh but I couldn’t face him.

“Haley!” He yelled, and opening up the door. “I thought you said you weren’t going to run away anymore,”

“Running away is safer than staying,” I said, with a blank expression. I was trying not to think of the image of Kayla’s face at the funeral, I barely saw it for a millisecond, and there it was stuck in my head for life. If I would have just gotten help, she wouldn’t have been there.

“Haley, you know I will always protect you,” He said gently.

“No!” I jump up. “You can’t protect, no one can, because the only thing that is messing me up is myself, and can’t protect me from myself. God, I am such an awful person,” I whispered the last part, realizing it was true. I knew I was about to break down, the way my voice shook when I talked, I don’t think I can hold it anymore.