Train Wreck

fifty-eight

Remington POV

"What did you do?"

I could not meet his eyes as Liss rushed past me but was torn between following her and trying to mend things with Benji.

How do I handle this?

I know Alice needs me.  She is overwhelmed and upset, plus feels endless pressure from every side.  She didn't move to Tulip Tree to deal with this garbage.  She just wanted a quiet place to raise Benji and instead got thrown into a garbage disposal of grief, tragedy, family secrets, and ... whatever I bring to the table.

"Remington... I'm not going to ask again. What did you do?"

Benji began to stand from the bed slowly while clenching his jaw.  I watched as his fists clenched slowly before relaxing as he squared his shoulders, staring through my body like a laser.

I closed my eyes to gather strength and decided to be honest. 

He can handle it and needs to know the truth.

"I fucked up and pressured her to open her envelope now because it's what I wanted. She stood up for herself and said no. I realized I was wrong and apologized." I explained slowly, trying to admit my faults in a clear way so my little brother could see I was flawed but trying to do my best.  That's all I can offer, right?  What Dad always... well... recently... taught me.  Just share your heart and let the chips fall where they may.

Benji cocked his head and squinted at me, relaxing his shoulders as I spoke. 

 "That's all?"

I paused, humming a moment before replying, "Well... yeah... I mean that's basically what happened..."

Benji chuckled, shaking his head, before brushing past me. "Bro, you're good. Just always admit when you're wrong and you two will be fine. Did she act like things were normal after and accept your apology?"

I laughed, "Yeah, she asked for one of my shirts after her shower."

"You're good. Seriously, that's all it takes with Lissy. Just be prepared cause she won't back down when she knows she's right."

His words were reassuring but I could not shake the feeling that more was wrong.  Lissy needed time but that was not a luxury available here at home.  Maybe a trip?  She could go with me to Atlanta when I pack up my apartment but then what about Benji?  Maybe both of them could go with me?

We made our way into the kitchen and watched as Liss threw the frisbee for Peach in the backyard.  I let my mind wander with ideas to try to cheer up a woman who was doing everything in her power to hold me together.

"Should we join her?" I asked, pulling back the curtains right on time to see Peach make a heroic leap for the frisbee.

"Nope. She needs space now." Benji answered, grabbing one of the grape Gatorades from the fridge. "Want one?"

I nodded, sitting at the counter, "Why does she need space? I don't know how I feel about this... like... isn't that bad?"

Benji chuckled at my statement and slid the sports drink across the counter toward me. "One thing I know about my sister is that she gets in her head. This is a lot to process and she's been so busy dealing with the two of us bozos that she hasn't had time to grieve on her own."

"What do you mean?"

"Remington... Lissy loved Dad, too..."

His words caught me off guard.  I froze,  Gatorade bottle halfway to my mouth.  "Well yeah, I know..."