Train Wreck

sixty-eight

LISSY POV

"Can you pass the soy sauce?" Daisy asked, dishing herself some fried rice and studying our entree choices while we unpacked brown paper bags of Chinese food cartons.  She and Doc arrived shortly after I got off the phone with Remington and I was thankful for the distraction.

Of course I expected it would be hard to watch Remi and Beep leave, but I had no idea how empty the house would feel without them.  Having friends join me for dinner was the perfect way to keep myself busy.

I grinned and grabbed that plus sweet and sour sauce from the fridge, placing both by her place at the table while we filled glasses of water and got settled. "Thanks again for bringing dinner. This looks amazing!"

Doc smiled, letting out a happy sigh as she enjoyed her first egg roll. "Fried carbs. You two are right. There is no better food group than carbs."

We laughed and chatted casually while passing dishes, waiting for Leah to join us once Maya was a bit more settled.  The pups would be here anytime now. We were all excited but knew that everything would be a lot more crazy once that happened.

Daisy had completed curtains for her room and was working on a romper similar to the one Trisha previously wore.  She excitedly showed us fabrics she wanted to try and assured me once she had it figured out she would make more for all of us.

I felt such a strong connection to this sweet girl and hoped that my prediction that she would be in Benji's life for a long time was true.  She was the perfect little sister.

"So... how do you feel, Alice?" Doc asked while pouring herself as well as me a glass of white wine and sliding a Coke to Daisy.  "Is it weird being alone or are you at the point where it's nice to have the quiet?"

I gave her a small smile and shrugged, not sure how to answer such a loaded question. "I FaceTimed with the boys a bit ago when they arrived at the apartment. The drive went smoothly and Benji was excited for pizza but they seemed tired and ready to get things done. I guess it's mostly weird still?" I sighed, moving food around my plate as I realized just how lonely the day had been.  "I've been processing the loss of my previous relationship with Benji for awhile now, since before we moved. I knew everything would change once he started high school and wanted to prepare myself so I wasn't blindsided. And it's not like I'm losing him completely, but I've known for awhile that things would shift and tried to I guess be ready? Does that make any sense?"

"That doesn't mean it's easy when reality hits, though," Daisy commented gently, sliding the platter of egg rolls toward me. "Mom and I talked about that lately, too. How everything needs to change between us but it's a good thing as long as we communicate and make sure we stay honest about how we feel. It has to be hard for you two to watch us get older and make choices you may not agree with, but that's part of growing up...." Her dark eyes found mine and I saw only understanding in the young girls gaze. "Liss, you're doing an amazing job. He loves you and I am sure all of us can make our way through this new phase without too much hassle.  If nothing else, Remi needed to spend one on one time with his half brother and this was the perfect way for them to get out of town for a bit."

"Exactly, Daisy.  Let them miss you.  Those two know how wonderful you are but I have a feeling that will be even stronger after they're away for a short while."  Doc's warm smile made my heart warm as I nodded, absorbing their compliments and sweet advice.

How did I get so lucky to have friends like these?

"I miss them but I'm also busy with the new job and would never rob them of the chance to make this trip. Benji's birthday just passed and we didn't do anything because that's what he wanted. He has a lot more autonomy now and is being open with both of us about his needs. I couldn't wish for a better brother." I smiled softly, remembering the conversation we had about the baseball tickets Greg bought everyone for Benji's birthday and how he decided to get a refund and donate that money to a cancer research fund.