Train Wreck

sixty-four

(Thank you for your patience- stay tuned for an Author's Note if you want an update <3 )

Alice POV

"You sure?" Becca's voice was quiet as she peered over her champagne glass while I toyed with a slice of pineapple on my fork.  A warm breeze caught my breath while we sat on the deck, enjoying our pool party.  My heart and mind were heavy from the discussion I had with Remington about his spontaneous road trip to Atlanta with Benji but I was trying my best to set those feelings aside and enjoy the gorgeous day and delicious food.

All I could do was shrug.  I wasn't sure of much except that I loved Remi and wanted to do my part for our relationship.  After thinking over our middle-of-the-night chat I realized I had more work to do on myself than I thought.

He may have been selfish but I have control issues.  We both need to give more than we are accustomed to if this will work, especially since Benji deserves only the best we have to offer him.  He's starting high school and will need his brother to guide him in ways I would never have the capacity to truly understand.

Now is the time for me to step back... even though I'm not ready.

Leah's hand slid over my shoulder with a comforting squeeze. "Lissy, you don't have to be so accomodating.  You could have told him to cancel or even reschedule the road trip.  That would have been more than reasonable.  Remi can't just spring stuff on you when you're all that boy has had for years.  It's not fair."

I chuckled, shaking my head as shouts from the pool took my attention from our conversation.   Daisy and Trisha were in an epic volleyball war against Remington and Taylor while Kenny worked alongside Benji at the smoker, monitoring salmon and debating what to work on next.  Ben debated trying to swim but was having fun as he played sous chef to our master smoker Kenny, taking notes on his phone on which seasonings worked with which meats along with time frames and temps.

My brother was a sponge, absorbing information and loving the distraction from his pain and annoying boot plus cast combo.  Trent peppered them with questions when he was not dipping into the pool as referee or stealing chips and salsa from the table.

"I don't feel like I'm really accommodating anything, though. Remi and Benji need this time together and he does have to go to Atlanta. I need to stay home to start my new job... I just..." 

The lengthy sigh that escaped my lips caused Leah to scoot her chair closer and wrap an arm around my waist, her head now on my shoulder.  The closeness made something in my heart shatter, reminding me how blessed I was to have these women in my life.

"Lissy, we will be with you the whole time. GIrls night with face masks and Daisy can make us chocolate cake. We can watch "You've Got Mail" and "Pride and Prejudice," even... the 1995 BBC Miniseries, of course, since it's way better than the Kiera Knightley movie as you know." Leah's voice had a lilt at the end, almost teasing me with her suggestion as I finally felt a sense of warmth build inside me.

Becca gasped, "Oh, and the new job is a huge step so let us know how we can help there, too. Do you have set hours or just kinda getting acclimated a bit?"

A genuine smile spread on my lips while I sat forward, sipping my mimosa before answering.  "Getting acclimated. This coming week probably Thursday or Friday I'll go into the office for a while to meet with my new boss in person finally. Remi set up my desk and computer so I'll be able to get my work setup ready and get used to the software." I offered another grin before continuing, "Oh, and they will be doing some hiking treks soon to show me the parks but insisted we wait until I'm more healed. I think I'll get a mini-tour of the office when I go this week but I'm excited to dive into my work. It will be nice to use my book learning for something professional."