Adopted by Billie Eilish

five

"night." i said with clear attitude. billie turned around and looked at me. she looked defeated. does she already hate me? i'm being such a bitch but shes pissing me off. she came over and sat on the edge of my bed not wanting to get any closer incase i snapped.

i couldn't face to look at her so i just picked at the skin around my nails as a form of self harm to ground myself from the amount of emotions i was feeling right now. they started bleeding but i carried on. billie cleared her throat and when she looked to see what i was doing a concerned look spread across her face. without hesitation, she scooted over to me and held me in her arms.

"gabby?" i hummed in response. i didn't have the energy to talk. "i want to talk to you. is that okay with you?" i released a breath i didn't know was even held and i opened my mouth to speak. "billie, i really don't have the mental capacity for this conversation right now, can we talk about it tomorrow?" she just nodded and stuck out her pinky. i interlaced it with mine and we both kiss either side. "you cant break a pink promise. especiallyyyyy when its been sealed." she said giggling. i forced a smile and said goodnight to her. as she walked out of my room she kept the door open.

as i heard her door close, i immediately ran into the bathroom and lift up the toilet seat. i get down on my knees and tie my hair up into a bun. i stick my fingers as deep down into my throat as i possibly could and i gagged loudly. i turn on the tap to reduce the noise billie could hear as i'm unsure if she is asleep or not. i continued to stick my fingers down but i was having no luck. so i grabbed my toothbrush from the sink and stuck it down my throat. a loud bork came out of my mouth and i coughed. as i looked into the toilet the small bite of burrito remained floating in the water. i flushed and pretended to wash my hands. i didn't bother cleaning up my face as i'm sure if she heard me she would of came in.

i started walking towards my room. as i opened my door i saw a familiar figure with green hair sat on my bed. with a saddened look across her face. i ignored her and lay down in my bed. not caring if i was about to fall off or not. i felt an arm pull me closer and i jumped at the sudden touch. "shit, i'm sorry." she said sincerely. "its okay." she gave me a light kiss on the head. "you best believe we are talking about this tomorrow." i sighed. "goodnight miss o'connell." i said in a sarcastic manner. she giggled. soon i heard heavy breaths escaping her mouth and i turned around to see her fast asleep. what the fuck am i meant to say tomorrow. i am completely and utterly fucked.