Eleanor's Desire

26. How fitting

Chapter 26

The past few days made Eleanor feel as if she was living through a glass where everyone could see right through her.

She had left the moment she'd heard of her fathers inheritances only to be told that she would take over her fathers role right after, it had her panicked.

She couldn't have such a significant role in the royal family. Usually she would have her moment of shock and come over it and think through the matter, but she was pregnant now. There was no thinking over it.

A knock on her door had her thoughts interrupted, she answered a quick reply that had a footman hovering over the door that was now opened ajar, "Your highness, a letter has arrived for you,"

Eleanor rise from her chair and hurried across her room, "by who?" She could possibly not think of a person who would contact her,

maybe it was Lillian...

She certainly could need her company but a letter would do, ancitipiation filled her as she thought about little George and Elijah, the footman gave her the letter and shut the door.

Eleanor's smile fell as she saw a familiar name as she opened it

Her eyes closing with fury as she forced herself to read

Dearest Eleanor...

I hoped to see you at the funeral, even catch a glimpse of you. To tell you that I've been plagued with regret ever since I betrayed you. I know my word will not earn forgiveness, but I want you to know nothing is worth more than you, it was a moment of foolishness that I agreed to your fathers words. Please let me make amends,

Yours, Kevin

Eleanor scanned the words once again thinking it must be from someone else, or more better the words written to someone else. She didn't feel the once heart ache at the reminder of Kevin, no. What she felt now was fury.

How dare he write to her!

How ironic now when she didn't want it.

Had it been last year when she cared and would trade her soul for a word from him she would have forgave him in a blink of eye, but no, he wrote now months later and after her fathers death. How fitting.

She was not naive. She would never fall for his tricks and thankfully no cell in her body felt anything for him no longer.

His letter only reminded her that she yet hadn't written Lorenzo, truthfully she hadn't had the courage. Afraid of what ifs, what would he say? Would he write her back? Would he even open the letter if he saw it was from her? God she had been tormenting herself with thoughts.

It was enough, she needed to face the elephant in the room sooner or later. And if not for herself she would do it for her child, once again caressing her stomach that had a light but not visible bump that only she could see forming without her clothes she caressed it over her gown,

"Don't worry baby... your father is an extraordinary man, but he has a big heart," indeed he has, after all he saved her from roaming around a city she knew no soul.

She imagined him taking care of a child and got reminded by the way he watched her when she cooed a crying baby in her embrace on the sea voyage to Rome, he had looked at her with a look that robbed every word from her thoughts, emotions flaring in his eyes that she couldn't really understand.

He was not a cold heartless man. Far from it. And that was enough for her.

Striding to her desk she grabbed her ink pencil and started writing,

Dear Lorenzo

Once you get this letter you must already hate me. There is several reasons, all of them having to do more with me than you. I have not been truthful to you, my name is not Nora. Well not particularly. My name is Eleanor Windsor, I am a princess or more accurately the daughter of a prince. I am a lady. Perhaps you are not aware of its meaning since I cannot translate in Italian I hope you understand. You must know that I never meant to deceive you, I never thought it would come this far. All I knew was that I couldn't lie no more. And I can't hold this very important news that I myself found out only after leaving to England, had I known I wouldn't left the way I did.

And now I found out I'm pregnant.

Once this letter reaches you I hope we can have some kind of settlement, I don't expect you to be in its life if that's not what you want. But my child deserves a father. And you deserve to know the truth.

I hope you can forgive me.

Yours sincerely, Nora.

Reading it over and over again until her eyes went cross she tucked the letter and swiped it close, it would've take a long while before it reached Italy.

She only hoped it would reach him.

_________________________

VOTE AND COMMENT