In His Light (Andy Biersack)

Chapter Thirty-Four(Waking Up)

Chapter Thirty-Four

      I'm sorry for the waiting D: I just have a boat load of summer homework...and anxiety(and possibly have become addicted to the walking dead soo...I love you Daryl). So those two aren't the best mix. I just updated this without checking so I'M SORRY FOR THE ERRORS! I will fix them ASAP. But thank you all for reading. Omgsh I freaking love you! Btw, you should check out @ShelbyStiches ! She's incredible:) I loveth her. And if you're into warewolves...like, why not check out my best friend? I dedicated this to her btw ^_^ vote, comment, message me! PLEASE! THE END IS NEAR(;_;)

(Waking Up)

       Her hair was fading along her withering porcelain skin, creating an obscene portrait of beauty and death. I wasn't ready to believe any of it yet. I was still chasing the moments, remembering the past. None of this seemed possible, seemed real. She wasn't mine to lose, right? I mean through all this time...it's not like I owned her...or somehow possessed any part of her perfect soul. Maybe it was the fact that she had owned mine. All along I belonged to her. She was the one that controlled all of these moments and memories. All of this everything.

       I stroked the thin sheet that covered her thickening stomach, my eyes shutting with the hope of feeling it's existence. In the darkness she was always my light. She was always my clarity, the pill that stopped all this illness in my world. My eyes were burning. My throat was swollen and my body hurt. There was no thought to the pain that kept coming...you just always made room for it.

       A tap on my shoulder shook me awake from the stir of sleep that had suddenly overtook me. I opened my eyes to see her slender pale body standing to my side, her bony fingers pricking at the boyish hairstyle that she had modeled her black hair in.

"Mom?" I asked half asleep.

"How do you feel?"

"I don't."

"Andy..."

"Why now?" I snapped, getting out of my chair to push her outside.

"Sweetheart, you need to sleep."

"No. I need to know Murey is alright. You need to leave."

"Andy..."

"She doesn't need anymore problems right now, and neither do I."

"I just wanted to see if she was okay." She whispered with a choking tone.

"She isn't."

"I can see that you're going back to your-"

"Yeah. I fucking am and why would you have a care at all as to how I am? Where the hell were you when I was in Murey's condition? Right, you were getting wasted away and sharing needles. Fuck off."

"Now I know I haven't been the best mother or...but you cant just shut me out like this again."

"You knew what he was doing to me! You knew what he was fucking doing! He did it to Leona and he did it to me and you just sat there like nothing ever happened. You bitch! You horrible fucking bitch!"

    I fell back into the wall behind me, holding my face with popping breaths. I couldn't cry again. I wouldn't let myself turn into this pathetic excuse to what I used to be. I could feel her gaze locked onto my crumbling height, all the guilt she should've felt laying right on the floor in front of me. I was just standing in all of the emotions he had taken away from me. I didn't even know where any of that had came from. I was going insane from not sleeping.

"I-I was scared." She admitted.

"Yeah," I spit, wiping my eyes. "How the hell do you think Leona and I felt? You know those kids you had with that ass?"