Mr. Rockstar is Sold

Ch-15 ★Heart, Stop beating

Ch-15 ★Heart, Stop beating

[Jay]

I jumbled up all the clothes on my shelf trying to find something to wear for Aulaura-no wait I meant Aura. She wanted me to address her by her nickname, Aura short and sweet just like her.

Argh, what was thinking again? I tossed another row of shirts off my shelf. There has to be something suitable in my closet.

 I could hear the soft sips of tea Aura was taking while she sat cross-legged on my bed, her legs wound up in the grey quilts.

“Anything would be fine,” I heard her say outside my walk-in closet, in the room. There was still that detached coldness in her voice. I knew for a fact it was because of the incident from earlier.

She pulled back from me, leaning against the kitchen’s counter. Looking down at her feet, she tucked a few strands of her brown hair behind her ear, her small hands falling to either side of her thighs. “You were talking about Melody, weren’t you?” Her voice trembled, slightly but enough to tell me she was hurt.

I heaved loud sigh, running my hands across face, frustrated. “I don’t know,” Why did she have to bring up her name? Just why? Why couldn’t my past leave me alone for one second? Why does it come back haunting me like a nightmare?

She retracted her eyes upwards, studying my face for a slight second; she titled her head to the side, causing loose strands to fall out of her bun enclosing her beautiful oval shaped face. “Why are you lying to me?” Coldness traced her voice. There was that strange accusing look in her blue eyes.

“I’m not lying. Aulaura, I’m messed. Please try to understand,” My feet automatically advanced towards her, reaching out for her cheek with my hand. She moved backwards, away from me. I let my hands drop. Why couldn’t I keep my hands off her for one second? Damn.

“I don’t understand,” She whispered, looking as innocent as a doe. “You loved her right?”

“I still do,” I turned my back towards her; I looked outside the window in the kitchen. Staring at the starless night, I felt strangely calm.

Then the turbulences of my mistakes hit me faster than a race car, my thoughts crashed against me, silencing everything else.

What was I doing? Toying with a girl’s emotions. I shouldn’t have kissed her. I regretted everything about it but I didn’t have the guts to tell her. I’m afraid I’ll only hurt her more.

“You should rest now,” I muttered, dryly not letting a single drop of emotion seep through. I have to distance myself from her. Sorry, Aulaura but I can’t let you in my life. I’m afraid my heart can take no more.

“Okay,” She mumbled.

I pulled out a random pair of sweatpants and a casual blue-green t-shirt. This will have to do. I walked out of the closet, closing the open door with my leg.

She sat on my bed, holding onto the porcelain tea-cup with both of her hands. The steam rose from the cup, covering her tired face with drops of water.  The tiredness encircling her eyes told me that she ready to knock out.

I walked around the bed’s frame, stopping by the foot where she was sitting. I held out the clothes for her to take.

She set the tea cup on the bedside table before hesitantly taking the clothes from hand. “Thanks,” She mumbled, biting the corners of her lips.

“No problem,” I replied, scratching the back of my head. “The bathroom is over there,” I pointed towards black door on the left end of my room next to my closet.