Welcome to my life and my thoughts. Poems.

I fell for it

First of all I know I seem to be saying sorry for not posting at all recently. I haven't been around much lately, I seem to be all over the place. My life just seems to be one big mess at the moment and to add to it all juggling exams is not a lot of fun. I keep saying sorry because I realy do mean it... Oh, and how could I forgot the number of reads my poems have got - 6,320 it's amazing - , I know a lot of them are people who just end up here, but like I've said before and I'll say it again, it means so much, so thank you so much for everyone reading this and getting this far!!

Anyway, this one is quite self explanatory, and as a new years resolution - a late one at that - I'm aiming to upload at least once very 2 weeks if not 1. Oh, and I'm not too sure if I have added this one before, I checked quickly, but couldn't see it, so sorry if it is. It's similar to another one too...

I fell for it,

Fell deep,

But now you tell me it was a waste of time,

I'm not the kind of girl who usually stays in 'it' for this long,

I take the easy exit out,

So I won't end up with pain,

I've avoided feeling like this for so long,

Lied to myself for so long,

But now I know why,

It hurts,

My heart feels like a weight has been droppend and crushed it so much that it ceases to exist,

I promised myself I wouldn't fall for anyone again,

I wouldn't be able to take it,

Truth is I was right,

It's taken me back to my old ways,

My ways to relieve pain,

I don't think I can go through all that alone again,

After telling me it was a waste of time,

You asked for a hug,

Who does that?

You told me we could still be great friends,

So cliched,

I should have told you my secret when I first met you,

But I was afraid,

Afraid you'd judge me,

And you would, even after everything we went through together,

You were quick to judge one of my best friends after I told you about what she does and how she suffers,

I share one of her 'habits',

The one after I told you, you sounded horrified at that,

You went on about it for days,

It killed me inside,

It's hard to stop,

I wished I could stop at the time,

And until you dropped those words on me yesterday I had,

But now I'm back where I started,

I thought not long ago that if I turned back to it,

I wouldn't have to go through it alone again,

Guess I was wrong.