You're In Loove

Secrets

A/N: This chapter is dedicated to sarabear6 because of the awesome new cover she made me!!! Thank you Sara you are the best!!! <3

Kim's POV

 When Jack and I's flight got in last night it was after midnight. His mom picked us up from the airport and dropped me off at home. When I got inside I found Payson asleep on the couch with the TV on, her face was stained with tear streaks. I lay a blanket over her and turn off the TV. I head upstairs to my room and get in my own bed, but I didn't fall asleep until two hours later. Last night I didn't have to face the reality of why I had to leave Hawaii early but now that it's morning I had to go downstairs and hear Payson explain everything to me while she cried. But instead I found out what really happened to my dad.

"What do you mean you knew?" I yell standing up from the stool I was perched on. Payson had just informed me that her and my mom knew that my dad was going to die.

"We didn't really know he was going to die we just knew there was a possibility that he would." Payson defends weakly.

"Payson what the heck is going on?" I ask throwing my hands up. "I want the whole story this time." I demand. Payson grabs my shoulders and sits me down at the kitchen table, a serious look washing over her facial features.

"About four months ago dad was diagnosed with stage two lung cancer." Payson begins. "At first he didn't really seem sick but he got worse as time went on, and the treatment he was getting here wasn't helping at all." Payson exclaims.

"Wait how is that even possible? He never even seemed sick to me." I say my confusion clear in my voice.

"He didn't want you to see him so sick so he hid it the best he could from you." Payson says brushing some of her hair behind her ear. "Anyway, him and mom decided to go to a really good treatment center in New York, so they just told you it was a business trip." Payson continues starting to tear up a little. "He started to get a little better and the doctors thought that he might actually make it, but two weeks ago he took a turn for the worst, he didn't recover he just got worse and worse until..."  Payson doesn't finish, she doesn't look up at me either she just stares at her clasped hands. This was all to much to take in right now.

"How could you all keep this from me?" I scream and Payson visably flinches.

"Dad thought he would get better, he didn't want you to see him so sick." Payson defends tears now streaming down her face.

"Because of you I didn't get to say goodbye!" I scream, starting to sob myself. "How could you keep something like this from me for months?" I choke out.

"Kim we did it to protect you." Payson sobs.

"Why does everyone thinking that I need protecting!" I yell back grabbing the edge of the kitchen table. "I'm not some fragile little girl!" I continue shaking the table slightly as I scream.

"Kim..." Payson stands up and starts towards me, but I back away from her hugging myself.

"Don't." I say coldly. I grab my gym bag and head down to the dojo, we all have keys just in case we want to get in a little extra practice time. But I didn't need the key because the light was on already. I saw a punching dummy moving slightly like someone was kicking it. I walk through the front doors of the dojo to find Jack hitting the dummy. "Need a sparring partner?" I ask coming up from behind the dummy Jack was currently kicking.

"Kim, what are you doing here?" Jack asks steadying the dummy after one last kick.

"I just needed to get out of the house." I state walking over to my locker. I hear Jack's footsteps behind me as I walk to my locker. "My sister told me how my dad died." I say blankly. I could already feel the tears pushing their way to the surface, all the pain rushing back all at once.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Jack asks unsure of himself.

"Can we just practice, I need to think about something else." I say turning away from my locker to face Jack. He nods understandingly, we walk to the mat and take turns punching and kicking the dummy. We talk about random things and I even laugh a little.

"Do you want to come to my house for dinner?" Jack asks as we finish up our little workout session.

"I would love to." I reply and Jack smiles at me taking my hand. We begin walking to his house, it took us longer than it usually does because we were walking extremely slow, because we weren't in a rush to be anywhere.

"I don't want to pry, but how did it happen?" Jack asks after a couple seconds of comfortable silence. I look at the ground and then back at Jack.

"He had stage two lung cancer." I choke out, Jack notices the change in my voice and wraps his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him as we walk. "They knew the whole time." I say quietly almost inaudible.

"What?" Jack asks looking down at me.

"He was diagnosed four months ago, my mom and Payson both knew." I say the anger rising in my voice. "They kept it from me this whole time and because of them I didn't get to say goodbye." I say angry tears falling from my eyes.

"Kim I'm sure they were only thinking about what was best for you." Jack says.

"You can't actually be siding with them?" I ask angrily. "Payson said they were just trying to protect me, but all they did was make everything twice as painful!" I shout back at Jack, we had stopped walking now.

"Kim when are you going to realize that you aren't made of steel!" Jack screams back at me and I'm taken aback by his comment.

"What are you talking about?" I cross my arms waiting for Jack's response.

"You act like nothing can touch you, that nothing could ever hurt you!" Jack continues. "Kim you are not bulletproof, you are human, things are going to hurt you, people are going to hurt you!"

"You mean like you." I spit coldly.

"I can't believe you are bringing this up now!" Jack yells in reply.

 "Yes Jack, because how am I suppose to move past something like you cheating on me with Bella when you won't even tell me why!" I argue. "I tried so hard to forget the whole thing but I can't!" I yell.

"Kim, I can't tell you why I did that, but I will spend the rest of my life apologizing for doing." Jack says stepping closer to me.

"Jack everyone in my life is keeping secrets from me, I need one person to tell me that truth, and that person used to be you." I say looking down at the ground. "So unless you tell me why you cheated on me, I'm leaving." I turn around and start walk towards my house alone. "Please come after me, please come after me." I whisper to myself, tears starting to fall from eyes, as I walk away. But Jack doesn't follow me, he doesn't even says anything, he just watches me walk away. I break into a run and run home sobbing. When I get home I run upstairs, Payson calling my name as I run through the kitchen. When I get to my room I lock my door behind me. I sit on my bed sobbing into my hands. I just wish I could talk to my dad one more time, tell him how much I love him, talk to him about everything that has happened in the last couple of months. I start to pace back and forth, all of these horrible thoughts popping into my head, all of the ways I could just end it right now, and the more I thought about it the better it sounded. I walk into the bathroom and open my medicine cabinet. I take out a bottle of painkillers, am I actually going to do this, just end it now? I stop thinking about it and just do it, the last thing I hear is the glass of water I was holding in my hand shattering as I hit the ground.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: CLIFFHANGER!!!!