The Bad and The Broken

Chapter 47

No credit for the drawing goes to me. I found it on google

Not edited so sorry for mistakes guys

Dawn'sPOV

We've decided on going on another brother-sister-date sometime next week. We haven't been on one in a while. Thinking back to it now, I remember pushing Ryder on his ass on the last date we went on and almost cringe. What got into me that night?

"Where to?" I ask.

He shurgs and says "Can we just walk around the town? I don't think we've actully just looked at it... been around it."

I nod, and return to picking out an outfit. I settle on grey sweat pants and red hoodie. I'm going to sweat like a pig- like I do every day- but I don't quite have a choice. Jesse wears red sweat pants and a black t-shirt.

We leave, ignoring our passed out father on the couch.

As we walk to school, I ignore the stinging of the jagged glass cuts on my back which are next to the currently healing lashes, with bruising surrounding them.

'More scars to the collection' I sadly thought.

My eye isn't swollen any more and the bruising is starting to go away. I safely avoided the questions thrown at me by Ryder's friends when they were at his house with us a couple of days ago. I just told them another lie about rough housing with Jesse, although Ryder was not convinced.

Speaking of Ryder, he's been ignoring  me- only giving me cold stares. Either he thinks I don't notice or just doesn't care. Even though I won't admit it, it hurts sometimes.

When his friends had left, he asked me why I won't talk to him. I simply answered by writing I'm a mute. He's been ignoring me since.

'But this is good,' I tell myself, 'this means he'll stop being so nice and trying to be my friend. Things will be normal again- easy again.'

But I knew that deep down I didn't want that.

I sit in the class, not bothering with covering my eye since I was early.

When the bell rang, I put my head down and played with my fingers.

I don't really know why I bother hiding my face. No one is going to notice, or even care, but Ryder and his friends. They're easy to lie to, though. I can always get out of it, so why bother hiding?

With that thought, I look up. No one notices.

When the bell rang again, I realized Ryder never walked through the door.

Maybe he's late?

I bounced my leg as I watched for him, though I don't know why I did, and after another 5 minutes, he still didn't show.

I felt my disappointment showing on my face when first period ended. But why am I so disappointed that I didn't see him? I should be over-joyed- no, no, I shouldn't even care at all.

When he wasn't in the next class I had with him, I came to the conclusion that he wasn't here today.

***

Ryder sits at his table with his lunch, then talks to his friends, while I sit at my table and watch the people around me. I decided to sit facing everyone today instead of facing the window.

This school really is the definion of stereotypical and cliche.

I watch as the jocks make out with their girlfriends or flings, and the goths bob their heads to the music in their headphones, the nerds do their homework, and others- average people- talk to one another. Ryder and his friends laugh and talk.

Maybe he was lateto school? Or maybe he just skipped his classes?

Pushing away the weird feeling in my chest, I took out a drawing I've been working on for a few days.

I was so concentrated on shading and adding more details to the drawing that I didn't notice someone sit in front of me until they cleared their throat.

I look up to see Jenny. She hasn't talked to me in a while.

She gave me a sweet smile that I did not return. I glance behind her to see the rest looking, but they quickly go back to their conversation.

"Hey, Dawn," she starts, "how have you been?"

I turn my drawing over and write a short fine.

She nods.

"You know you can talk to me. I know, remember?" She says, her eyes narrowing a bit.

They set her up to do this. Obviously if I talked to her, they could see me talking. I take my paper back and reply to her.

'I'm a mute, remember?'

She simply nods and gets up.

"Can I have this? To show them?"
I shrug and push it towards her.

I have no reason to keep a drawing of Ryder anyways. I don't know why I drew him in the first place.

As she walks back to her table, drawing in hand, I decide to leave.

I put my things back in my bag and get up to go to a the picnic tables outside the cafeteria.

I sit down and enjoy the nature around me. It's sunny but breezy today, which is keeping me from getting too hot.

I rest my head on my hands and wait for lunch to end.

***

I sat in Automotive Engineering class, staring at the ground. Ryder actually showed up to this class, but has been ignoring me at all costs. I was surprised when he didn't give me any glares or looks.

I made myself busy by pretending to read a book about tools. I glanced up every once in a while to look at Ryder- who has been talking to some guy whole time.

He usually talks to me.

I let out a sigh. Why am I so upset about this? This is good. But there was still no use in denying the saddness I felt about him ignoring me.

When the bell rang, I slowly walked to music. I thought about skipping, but decided against it. It's one of the only classes I can actually stand to be in- even though we hardly do anything.

I sit in a corner in the back and Ryder sat in the middle with his friends. The teacher wasn't here today and the substitute looked to be sleeping at the teacher's desk.

While the class talked to one another, I decided to draw. I took out a piece of paper and a pencil, then put my ear buds in my ears. I relaxed my body as the music flooded my ears.

I was in the middle of doodling my third rose when the bell rang.
That was fast.

I pack my things and wait outside for Jesse. We're supposed to go to Ryder's today, but I don't think he wants to see me.

We walk to the house together. Not saying a word.