Sixteen

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<< C h a p t e r 16>>

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<< C h a p t e r 16>>

I escaped again.


Running away from problems I didn't want to handle. I left Taehyung's house, not looking back.


Are his words trustworthy? He was intoxicated, he probably won't remember what he mentioned just then. Yet, what if it's real? Taehyung still loves me?


I took off my heels as I entered my apartment. I massaged my legs, feeling the muscles all tensed from wearing those heels for a long day. I opened the fridge to get myself a bottle of water, wait, I don't remember myself buying groceries.


The fridge was full. Not a single crisper was empty. My mind clicked, knowing this was his work.


Jungkook.


My gaze dropped to the ground as tears started to fill up. I covered my mouth to muffle a cry at midnight. Jungkook did so many things for me. Did he really think I didn't notice other than the groceries, he paid my rent and also the debts of my father? He would care for me and never complain. It was always me seeking help from him, I never did anything for him.


Not even asking him how was his day. I never did what a friend should do. I do not deserve him.


I plopped down to the bean bag placed in my balcony. Staring at the moon hanging above the city. What do I do?


I care for Taehyung, it was a no brainer that I still love him. Yet, every cell in my body is telling me to stay away from him. As far as I can.


Is it just me who's still not over what happened years ago?


The rain started to pour without omen. The droplets were splashing towards me when they hit the side, I moved back a little, but I refused to go back indoor. I have to clear my mind here before I sleep.


"Lea? What are you doing here? It's raining!" Hoseok, my neighbour came out to his balcony which is right next to mine. He was in his pyjamas, his hair dishevelled while he clumsily collected his clothes from the hanger.


"I'm uh..." I paused, not knowing how to answer his question.


"Something got stuck in the head?" Hoseok asked, holding a mountain of clothes in his hand.


"You can say so." I smiled a little.


"Go to sleep. Whatever's bothering you right now, it will get better tomorrow. When you wake up. It's a brand new day." Hoseok beamed, like the sunshine himself and entered his apartment.


I guess I should sleep then.


If I can.

















Why is it raining again?


I sighed, my hand clenching onto the transparent umbrella tightly. I just hope I wouldn't be soaking wet by the time I arrived at work.


The sound of a car honking startled me. Taehyung came out from his car with a grey umbrella above his head, running towards me.


"Good morning." Taehyung smiled and I did the same. "I'll drive you."


"How are you feeling? You should be feeling awful from a hangover." I chuckled while Taehyung drove.


"I'm fine. I ate the soup you made and the aspirin on the dining table. Thank you for taking care of me yesterday." Taehyung said, glancing towards me and I mumbled a no problem and watched the windshield wiper did its job to brush away the rain splashing on the glass.


"Lea?" He called and I hummed in reply. "Are you gonna ignore what happened yesterday?" Taehyung queried.


My eyes widened and I felt uneasy. I crossed my arms, anxious to even look at Taehyung.


"What are you talking about?" I inquired. Taehyung was probably referring to something else, he couldn't possibly remember what he said yesterday.


"I meant every word I said last night," Taehyung stated firmly, only to make me more nervous.


He remembers.


"Taehyung, I-i"


"I know it's stupid for me to realize that I'm still fucking in love with you after so many years. I was being oblivious to my feelings after we separated. I-i was blinded by anger but I can't deny the feelings inside me when I see you. I trust that there's still spark between us, there are still chances for us to start fresh-" Taehyung added.


"I can't, Taehyung." I interrupted, "I can't." I bit my lips to stop the tears from flowing out freely.


Is it odd to say that I love him but I don't want to be with him? I love him, very much. Yet, I'm scared, I'm scared of the worst things that could possibly happen.


"Why?" Taehyung said his voice breaking.


"I can't trust you." I spoke, "I can't seem to give myself to you again with all trust. What if we hurt each other again? What if you cheat on me again? What if I-i cheat on you again?" I questioned, already gave up on trying to hold the tears. I was pouring every thought out, right now, here.


"I will not, that was what I regretted the most in my whole life, trust me, Lea," Taehyung begged.


"This is not how trust works, Taehyung. We don't just say it, we do it. You can't just tell me to trust you." I let out a shaky breath whilst Taehyung looked at me puzzled. I realized he stopped the car somewhere on the street.


Taehyung remained silence for a while before speaking again. "What do I do to make you trust me?"


"I don't know, Tae." I gulped, feeling stressed from the tensed conversation between us. The trust between us was broken years ago, would it be too late for us to fix it now? Nonetheless, how do we fix this? Trust takes time and happenings to build, it's not something to be done overnight.


"Give me time, I-I'll prove it to you. I'll prove to you that you can trust me-e." Taehyung bit his lower lip and he anticipated a response from me.


"Tae-" I was about to answer but the ringtone of my phone cut me off. I fished it out from my purse and the caller was Jin. I immediately accepted the call, fear to hear bad news.


"Hello?" I said.


"Lea, we found a donor for your mother!"


"Lea, we found a donor for your mother!"

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Hi, sorry it took me so long go update.
My assignment keep me busy:)

colour that star at the bottom as support?

💜

𝐶𝐻𝐸𝐴𝑇𝐸𝑅𝑆 (ᴋ.ᴛʜ) ✓Opowieści tętniące życiem. Odkryj je teraz