Chapter 43

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Ophelia didn't cry. 

The thick lump from holding back sobs remained lodged in her throat, making her weary of speaking for fear of launching herself into an emotional fit. Edward was twice as loving and kind than usual, stroking her hair and murmuring sweet words into her ear in hopes of distracting her from the drama that had just occurred. 

When she still hadn't spoken, he simply resorted in a different approach. Leading her up the stairs and sitting her on the closed toilet, starting a hot bath and leaving only to retrieve a clean set of comfy clothes. He put bubbles in the bath purely because he remembered her telling him that the texture made baths tolerable. 

Water outside the bath frightened her. It clouded her other senses; distorting her hearing, the weight holding her down, even her nose would be useless. She struggled enough without her sight, more than she ever let on of course, but anytime one of her other senses started to lack it fed her anxiety. 

He turned around long enough for her to undress, and she used his shoulder as stabilization to carefully sit down in the tub. Ophelia sighed at the temperature, accepting the feel of the bubbles and tried her best not to think about her mother. 

Edward turned around carefully, not wanting to push Ophelia's boundaries when she was already in a vulnerable state. She was covered by the cloud of bubbles he had created. He sat down patiently on the floor, and even let Kingsley in after his whining and scratching at the door ruined the tranquil moment. The poor dog couldn't help but worry about his Ophelia either. 

Leaning his big head over the edge of the tub the dog sighed heavily, eyes trained on his owner as if to make sure nothing bad would ensue as long as he watched over her. At some point she handed Edward her shampoo bottle and quietly asked if he would wash her hair, something Bella used to do when they were younger and their mother had upset her. 

Edward massaged her head gently, noticing the way her shoulders relaxed and her body became less tense. In a way it wasn't much better, more like she was deflating. He had rinsed her hair thoroughly, his hands never straying from her hair as not to make his mate uncomfortable. 

When the water ran cold and her skin pruned up he held up a towel, closing his eyes as she wrapped herself up and only opening them when her hand felt its way to his face, holding it softly as if to say a non verbal thank you. 

It wasn't until they were sat in her room that she spoke. Ophelia's voice so quiet that if Edward hadn't been a vampire he probably wouldn't have heard. 

"What did you do?" 

It was then that Edward's heart shattered. Not just because he was angry at her mother for putting awful thoughts into her head, but because he was especially angry with himself for giving her grounds to do so by leaving in the first place. Her voice was so delicate when she asked, almost like a child. He had to close his eyes for a second just to try to speak without his own voice breaking. 

"Nothing that you'd think." Edward's internal narrator scolded him for being so plain and he sighed, pulling her close to his body and explaining further. 

"At first I went to Denali. That was where my family and I had decided to stay for the time being. I don't think they realized how serious I was at the time," his brows furrowed close together, the more he thought about it the more pain seemed to surface in his own body, and his voice was becoming gravelly from the strain it took to push out each word. "It became too difficult. Being surrounded by all the couples, hearing their thoughts about each other and their worry about me. You'd be surprised how often my family thought about you, and the concern they held for your well being also." 

Edward held her hand, lightly stroking the back of it as if needing to be close in order to continue the story. He had only told her brief answers prior to now and it was like opening up an old wound for the both of them. 

"Alice was always watching you but constantly trying to block me out. I guess they feared that me seeing you in the state you were in would send me off the edge rather than back into your arms. They know how self deprecating I can be. Eventually being near them became too much so I left. I just traveled for a bit, roaming around mindlessly in hopes of forgetting our pain. My intention was that if I kept moving I wouldn't run back here, but there were times I'd notice I somehow changed course and was headed back to Forks - towards you. I ended up in Brazil when I got the phone call about what happened to you. And, well you know the rest." 

Edward shuddered, as if scared that telling Ophelia all of this would make her resent him. 

"I feel," he paused, struggling to get his words out again, "incredibly lucky to be on the receiving end of your love and affection. Even though I don't deserve it after doing such a terrible thing. I wasted so much time, running away from the only thing that has made my second life worthwhile in fear of hurting you. Thinking you'd somehow forget me or something, and I only hurt you worse. I will never be able to fully express how sorry I am, or how grateful I am that you found it in you to let me back into your life after all that suffering." 

Ophelia's skin prickled at his words. She knew that he would be crying right now if he could, and her own heart seemed to expand hearing what he had to say. Ophelia knew that he blamed himself - that it was never Jasper or herself he was angry with. She remembered scolding him because he hadn't fed, and him brushing it off not expecting anything to happen. There were so many factors and things that could have been different, things that didn't have to happen. The only constant during it all was their love for each other, and how despite how hard it was it only proved how far he'd go to protect her from himself. 

"I shot at you," she mumbled, making Edward throw his head back as a deep laugh rumbled from his chest. 

"Yes, you did. And I couldn't have been more proud at that moment, though your father was by far the proudest. He was slightly disappointed when you let me go without a scratch." 

Ophelia giggled a little, "I was thinkin' about grazing you but I didn't wanna risk having the vampire talk." 

She tugged him close, hugging his cold body tight before remembering one thing. 

"Rose told me about Tanya. Did you -" 

Edward stopped her right away, already aware by the dark blush growing across her cheeks and neck what she was going to ask, making a mental note to argue with his sister later for mentioning that horrid thought to Ophelia.

"Oh my beautiful girl," he chuckled and pulled her onto his lap. Tugging her face gently upwards he kissed all over her skin. Her forehead, her cheeks, her nose. "I can say with 100% confidence that I felt no attraction towards Tanya and I definitely did not entertain any thoughts directed my way. She was made very clear by both my sisters and me that my heart was already taken and that I had no interest in looking at another woman the way I look at you." 

Ophelia shivered at his words, his fingertips following down her spine and then holding her against him. "So you never? Before you met me?" 

Edward smiled at her shyness, pressing a short kiss to her neck he pulled back once again to see her flush red again. "No I haven't. In my vampire life I have not fallen in love, or been with someone romantically or physically until I met you. I know you think that because what other's have said vampires are meant to be attractive, but I can assure you that I have never felt susceptible to someone's beauty until I laid eyes on you." 

Ophelia started to shake her head in disbelief only for him to grasp her face, stroking the skin softly and speaking.

 "You are by far the closest thing to the heavens that a damned creature like me could ever experience."




Okay but this chapter was so precious to me. Someone find me bf cuz ya girl is lonely after writing all this 

<3

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