Sanders Sides One-shots (Mainly Prinxiety)

Copulation (RxV/PxL)

Definition: Sexual intercourse.

"males may seek copulation with the breeding female"

~

"Copulation is necessary Patton, as much as Virgil does not want to admit it"

"Whats copulation?"

...

well shit.

Went Logan's thoughts. Not extremely elegant or articulate, but it did sum up his situation right now. 

He didn't always have to be eloquently spoken in his thoughts anyway.

"Seriously, whats copulation guys?" Patton chuckled nervously, seeing the looks on Virgil and Romans faces. He pouted slightly, tugging on Virgil's hoodie "Virgil! Kiddo, care to explain please?" Patton continued to whine.

"No, no no no. This is a job for the walking webster dictionary himself" Virgil said, directing Patton to logan. Logan sighed, every time things got awkward, they brought in Mr. Robot to avoid the dirty work.

Oh well. 

Roman put his arm around his Newly acquired boyfriend's hip and whispered something in Virgil's ear.

Because Logan had good hearing, and Patton wasn't paying attention, he (unfortunately) caught the little side comment Roman considered funny.

"This is going to be good"

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose "Ok, so Patton, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much...do you know how they start their own family?" 

"They order a stork, obviously. What do you guys take me for?" he said smiling.

Logan looked to the other two traits for some help, giving them the 'if you don't fucking help me, I will put fire ants in your pillow when you least expect it, coward' Face. It was used quite often.

Needless to say, they won't be sleeping very well for the next two weeks or so.

Logan scowled, adjusting his tie and clearing his throat.

"Ok, so have you ever heard the term 'sexual intercourse', Patton?" Logan asked, looking the curious trait in the eye. " I guess..." he mumbled.

dear lord, this poor guy doesn't know what that is...

"Well, in any case, sexual intercourse is when a male and a female, or you and your significant other....well, the male genital is inserted into the females....hole or just something is inserted into somethings hole, but normally the male ejects something of a fertilizer for the female's egg. that becomes a baby inside the woman's uterus, which is why they get really enlarged stomachs before giving birth. " Logan finished, trying to stop his cheeks from heating up. he refused to blush in front of Patton.

Patton...however, might need a minute to get the disgusted look off his reddening face

"Oh my fuck, Logan I think you broke him" Roman snorted, slightly concerned.

"I could have done it much better than that..." mumbled Virgil

"Yes, but you didn't! You mad the 'walking dictionary' do it for you!" Logan snapped at him, while Virgil just shrugged, poking Patton's shoulder "Pat...you ok?"

He shook his head, giving a small chuckle "Yeah, just need a minute kiddo"

"I assure you, copulation is a very natural and efficient way to have a baby. it's nothing to worry about since we don't have kids, as we are only traits and aspects of Thomas's personality" Logan soothed, sitting Patton down.

Roman and Virgil looked at each other and sighed....the worst was over, who knows what else they'd have to explain to him.

"Should we give him the talk about STDs now or some shit?" Roman asked, pulling a blanket over him and Virgil, cuddling him close.

What an eventful evening.

...

Ah a little microshot, just some awkward humor, and an innocent Patton.

just a notice, this is the explanation of copulation, and making a baby, so I limited it to just straight couples. 

Au Revoir!!!

...

***BONUS SCENE!***

...

"So is that what Virgil and Roman are doing when I hear banging at night?"

Virgil's face flushed beet-red, as he hid in Romans sash, while roman tried not to burst out laughing while clutching Virgil close.