Fearless (Bellamy Blake - Book 1)

Chapter 42

My teeth grit together as I stand on the river bank,  watching as group of kids search through the water to try and find the radio that Bellamy and I disgarded.

After Bellamy and I confessed about what we did, we all went straight back to camp, gathered a few people and left for the river, but so far there's been no sign of it and all the while Clarke, Finn and Raven have been giving the two of us the cold-shoulder, something that only irritates me further.

Bellamy and I decide to stay clear of the search, instead staying on the bank where no one can accuse us of interfering more. I'm no mind reader, but I think I know Bellamy pretty well, and I can tell that under the current tough act he's putting on, he's genuinely sorry about what we did.

Myself on the other hand, well, I don't really know what I feel. I do feel guilty that 300 innocent lives depended on Raven radioing back to the Ark, but at the same time, we didn't know that when we trashed the radio.

I look up as Raven makes her way over to us, a pissed look on her face. "If we don't find that radio--"

"What?" I hiss, turning and squaring up to her. "What are you gonna do, Raven? Huh?"

She shakes her head and looks me up and down with a judgmental look. "Finn was right. I didn't wanna believe him, but he was right. I have no idea who you are anymore, Chris."

"Yeah? Well that's the definition of a traitor for you." I say bitterly but she ignores me.

"You used to be this fun, carefree kid." She continues. "Now you're just a sad, emotionless bitch. But I guess that's a given when you become a murderer."

"All right, that's enough." Bellamy stands and comes beside us, giving a hard look to Raven. "You have no idea what Chris has been through down here."

I notice that he uses my first name like Finn and Raven do--they're the only two that do anymore--as a point that he maybe does know be better than them, but I don't bother telling him otherwise.

"No, I don't. But I bet you know all about it."

"Yeah actually, I do." Bellamy nods. "Because unlike you and Finn, when she needs me, I'm there for her."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Raven takes a threatening step closer her. "You think you know her?"

"Better than you."

"I doubt that."

"Will you both shut up?" I snap, causing them both to look at me. "It's clear that neither of you know me and at the moment I'm kind of grateful for that."

We all stay silent for a moment before a fourth voice gains our attention.

"Hey! I found it!" Jones runs through the water with the radio in hand and Raven and everyone else runs towards him, Raven taking the radio from him.

Bellamy sighs before following them, and I reluctantly follow after him, both of us hanging back as Raven inspects the radio.

"Can you fix it?" Clarke asks her.

"Maybe. But it'll take half a day just to dry out the components to see what's broken."

"Like we said, it's too late." Bellamy says from beside me, his arms folded across his chest. Raven gives him a pissed off look whilst Clarke stalks forward.

"Do you have any idea what you did?" She looks between us, fire in her eyes. "Do you even care?"

"Want me to answer that honestly?" I deadpan.

"You asked us to help, we helped." Bellamy inputs.

"Three hundred people are gonna die today, because of you two!"

"Hold up." Raven interrupts. "We don't have to talk to the Ark, we just have to let them know we're down here, right?"

"Yeah but, how do we do that with no radio?" Finn asks.

Raven has a knowing look on her face, a smile that makes anyone believe she's the smartest woman ever, and my lip twitches at the memories that resurface. She always had that look when she came up with a new creation or solved an impossible task. I used to love seeing that look on her face because it meant she was happy.

I used to love seeing Raven happy.