You're Just As Troubled• Billy Hargrove

~Chapter Thirty Five~

"Nancy you sure this looks okay?" I asked. I was wearing all black including a black mini skirt and a black long sleeve. I had cat ears on and was going to Tina's party as a black cat.

"You look so cute" she exclaimed.

"You girls ready?" Jonathan asked as he peeked into the room. We both shook our heads and headed downstairs.

"Ahhh let me get a picture really quick" Joyce said slightly frazzled. We all lined up near the door posing for a quick picture before heading to the car.

"Now Phoebe if you want to leave Steve will come get you. Just call him" Nancy said.

We pulled up to what seemed like the biggest party of the year. Toilet paper was hung all over the trees and garbage littered the lawn.

We all walked in to music blasting and everyone having a good time.

"Hey Phoebe" some guy said handing me a drink.

"I'm sorry who are you?" I asked as I sipped the from the cup.

"Oh Ethan, sorry I forgot about the whole memory thing" he said cracking a smile. "Wanna dance?"

I looked around trying to find Nancy and Jonathan.

"Maybe later" I said but he grabbed my wrist pulling me onto the dance floor.

Before I could even try to break from his grasp, someone comes knocking him out. I look to my right to see Billy. He quickly walks off not saying a word.

I run to a nearby phone when I pause, Nancy never gave me Steve's number. She probably assumed I knew it. I sighed running my hands down my face.
I headed outside and waited for Nancy and Jonathan. I'd rather wait all night outside than to wait inside for them.

"I'm leaving this party is bullshit" Billy called out to a bunch of guys. They seemed displeased with his choice in leaving.

"What are you doing out here by yourself?" Billy snickered.

"I ah wasn't so into the party I guess"

"Hey can we talk" Billy asked calmly his tone changed from his normal angry at the world tone.

"I guess" I said. Billy lit a cigarette before he began.

"Would you ever consider going out with me again. We could start fresh" Billy said. I traced circles in the dirt with the tip of my boot.

"Billy, I don't think so.... every time you look at me you see a lifetime of memories whether they are good or bad. You have a version of me you liked, but that version no longer exists. I'm never going to be what I once was and I wouldn't want you to be hung up on trying to make me that person again" I said looking up at him.

"Loved" was all Billy said.

"What?"

"You said you have a version of me you liked, your wrong I have a version of you I loved" Billy said.

His words sinking it my brain. "Loved" kept replaying. He loved me. Loved as in past tense. I also thought about how I  haven't given him any reason to love me right now.

As I was about to say something shots were fired. People began to run everywhere but I froze, my brain began to ache and I fell to the ground.

"Mom? Mom?" I cried out.

"Phoebe, you be strong" my mom breathed. I was hovering over her dead body. Blood was pouring everywhere, but nobody moved, they stood still afraid they would be the next person to die.

"Mom?" I repeated until an officer came and pried me off of her body.

"She was shot. She was shot" I cried as I watched them wrap up the body. Caution tape was being placed, officers began to question everyone getting witnesses stories and each second kept ticking by, no one stopped to reflect what happened, to reflect that a woman just died.

"Phoebe" someone called out.

"Phoebe"

"Phoebe" Billy yelled as he was towering over me. I had awoken to find myself in a cradle position on the ground.

"C'mon we have to go" Billy said lifting me into Jonathan's car. Jonathan peeled away with Nancy in the passenger seat.

"Phoebe are you okay?" Nancy asked. I looked at her seeing double the Nancy's. I grabbed my head and closed my eyes for a few seconds until I reopened them. 

"My mom, my mom just died. We have to turn around" I yelled panicking trying to claw my way out. Nancy looked at me strangely while Billy held my arms down.

"What's wrong with her?" Jonathan asked.

"Phoebe you're safe just calm down" Nancy said.

"My mom is dead" I sobbed uncontrollably.

"She remembers" Nancy whispered to Jonathan and Billy. "I think it was the gun shot it almost triggered her memory"

Jonathan dropped Nancy off before heading back to the house. Jonathan parked the car and he and Billy helped me out.

"I got her. Thanks Billy" Jonathan said as he grabbed my arm and walked me to the door. I was beyond exhausted and just needed sleep.

"What's wrong with her?" Joyce asked all concerned. She helped Jonathan get me up the stairs and into my bed.

"My mom is dead" was all I said before falling to sleep.