Moonlight Kisses

one of billions

I don't think I've ever been this nervous in my entire life. Not for a presentation for a class or acting in front of dozens of people. All of those things I had the practice to help put my mind to rest. There was no rehearsing this though.

I'm getting ready to introduce the love of my life to my dad. I've been nearly shitting bricks all day.

I've known about this dinner for a while now, I've had more than enough time to prepare myself for the nerves that came bounding into the pit of my stomach the second I woke up. It's all my thoughts revolved around while I was at school. It's the only thing me and Beau talked about during lunch was him meeting my dad. Not for the first time though. They briefly crossed paths at back-to-school night at the same time our parents met for the first time as well. Again they met on Halloween when he and Jake came to pick up me and Sophie from my house since they were our ride to whoever's party we attended that night. But by that point, my dad had already heard of him, already drew up his conclusions before having a single conversation with him. Like I had done during that time. This is the first time they meet where there's actually something on the line⎯us, my relationships with both of them.

Putting it in those terms makes my stomach do a somersault. If my dad weren't the one taking me to the restaurant where we're meeting Beau, I definitely would've taken a sip of vodka to calm my nerves.

All I can do is hope, pray, that things go well tonight. I hate to be the one thinking this way, but it's just a smidge better that my mother's not going to be with us. Neither is Kat. They're the more outspoken ones out of the four of us, put Beau in that mix and it'd be a boiling pot of tension waiting to explode. At least my dad is a little calmer, and he seems willing to hear us out. I know he won't bring up Beau's past or anything that's going to rock the boat in a sense. He only wants to get to know Beau, get to know his intentions, and decide if Beau's someone good for me to have in my life. My dad could give two shits about who Beau was before me, all he genuinely cares about is who he is with me. That makes things a whole lot easier and my worries about an explosion happening subside.

If I'm lucky enough, by the end of the night, we'll convince him that what we're doing is right. And eventually, he can talk some sense into Mom too. Dare I say, our family could be whole again. Not torn in conflict. Then all will be right in the world. Is that really too good to be true?

I retrieve my necklaces from my nightstand to put them on over my high neck top. I had to pick something that didn't show so much skin for tonight. I don't want to give off the awkward impression to my dad, of all people, that all me and Beau do is have sex. It's my decency I'm trying to salvage and it's not all that decent to go around flaunting the hickeys, among other bruises, that are scattered across my neck. My dad already knows I have sex thanks to Kat's loudmouth, but I still don't think he'd appreciate the fact sitting right in front of him for him to see. It's bad enough he knows, I don't want to face the embarrassment of having those marks on either of us.

My dad knowing I know how to give a hickey in the first place is mortifying enough to send me to the grave. For Beau's sake, I hope he finds a way to cover those up too.

While I'm busy struggling to get the moon crescent necklace clasp done, my dad's figure shows up in my doorway. Lightly he knocks on the doorframe to get my attention.

I put the necklace in my hand and turn around from my mirror to face him. "You ready?" he asks, eyeing the hint of gold chain dangling from between my fingers.

"Yeah," I sigh shakily, anxiously clicking my heel against the floor repetitively. I start to question my decision of leaving my hair down instead of putting it up in a ponytail. I already feel the strongest urge to start running my fingers through it just to occupy my hands.