Dirty Little Heart

Disclose.

"Where did you get that?" I ask as I look at Ethan while I stand there, trying to figure out the situation.

"Oh, so you're going to point a gun at my head, huh? Well, I guess I might die a dramatic death," Says Roger, taunting Ethan.

"Well, it's not gonna be me, Says Ethan while he looks at me."

It was surreal. Everything I wanted was in front of me. I wanted Roger out of the picture and Ethan made it possible to fulfil it. I had every opportunity to do what he did to me. To make him realise the true meaning of the torture he inflicted on me.

Ethan lowers the gun and hides it at the back of his waist.

"Pulling the trigger would only do you a blessing you don't deserve. States Ethan."

"So, what're you going to do? Huh? Ask Roger. I could see he was getting frustrated."

"Well, it's not up to me, is it?"

Ethan moves back a few steps, allowing me to do anything I wanted to do. I move towards Roger, who's cautiously progressing with every move I take. But he couldn't do anything. His hands were tied up.

I stand there and watch him helplessly, just like he had made me before. Tied, beaten, bruised.

I prepare myself to make a hit perfectly on his face, but I stop.

"I won't, I say."

I could see the confusion on Roger's face. No person would just leave, knowing they can finally avenge themselves. This was one of Roger's mottos. He abused it for his own pleasure.

"If I hit you, which, for fuck's sake, I will, I would be just like you. I want to rip you apart for what you fucking did to me, but that's on you, not me. And I won't be the one to change myself into someone I would only throw shit on."

I rush towards the hall, leaving Ethan and Roger alone in the so-called library room.

I take some deep breaths as I try to gather my thoughts. I walk over to the sofa and sit like it was my place while I remove my jacket.

Ethan emerges from the room only after a few seconds and gazes at me. Instead of coming towards me, he goes over behind the kitchen counter at the right side of the hall.

"Wine? Or champagne? He asks."

"Wine would be good."

He picks out what seemed to be one of the most expensive wines I didn't even know of and takes out two glasses.

As he walks towards me, my eyes go around his interior again.

"These are beautiful, I say."

"Thank you. Not everyone appreciates them."

"Well, people rarely appreciate what has been gifted to them. I say."

I take a long pause before I spoke again.

"When I was 4.. I used to play in the garden at the back of our house. There I had a small tent I made of curtains and old clothes we didn't use. So whenever I wanted to play and have some memorable moments with myself, I would go there."

"One day, I remember, Dad came home with this 50 or 60-year-old guy, of course, older than him. My father told me he's gonna take care of me he comes back from the grocery market. And I went with him outside in my tent to play."

"After a while, I could feel him touching me here and there. Of course at the moment I thought he was just tickling me, but after a while, he playfully pinned me down. I... I didn't know what he was doing, but all I knew it was hurting me. So so so bad. I kept saying it hurts, but he didn't stop. All I could do is call out for daddy."

"And he did. Not only did he see what his big brother was doing to me. He stood there, and he watched instead of protecting his daughter like the old man's do. He watched."

"At 17, I had a really evil company, you know? Drugs, alcohol, partying all day and all night. That's when I met Roger. He was nice at first, sweet. He knew what I wanted to hear and he would say the exact thing. For the first time in my life, I felt I was safe. Until one day, he had a lot to drink, and he had his friends over at our apartment."

I was right beside him when out of nowhere he touched me and say things he wouldn't even say when we were being intimate. Shouting at him to cut this shit out only made things worse. I was about to get out of there until he grabbed and twisted my hand so hard and banged me against the wall. Doing the same thing what I had been through before, letting others watch as I call out for help."

"I don't know. I guess I just saw an opening after a week. I ran away, not letting anyone know where I was, not even the ones who were close to me. I just... disappeared."

"Not until now."

I look down to hide my eyes from Ethan's gaze. There was a moment of silence before he stands up and walks over to me.

He sits right beside where I was sitting without bodies only inches apart. I see his hand moving forward to cup my face, but he stops in the middle.

"Not till you say so, Ms May."

I fall into his sparkly intense eyes as I let go. He cups my face in his hands, not moving forward to kiss my lips, but my forehead.

"You're too precious to be taken advantage of, says Ethan,"

He is so beautiful. I was vulnerable. I could easily fall into any man's traps. Not that I would let them, but instead of jumping into this opportunity, all he did was comfort me. Not moving on to the 4th step, couples usually make on 2nd or 3rd date.

Before I could realise, I was already falling asleep right in his arms, keeping me secure.