I effing love you

Part 53

Slowly but surely things are getting back to normal, except for the fact we're doing pop quizzes every night. Haley and I are determined for Missy to do well, she's sat these exams more than once and we're determined to make it the last time. The only thing she really struggles at is maths like me but weirdly Haley seems to be better than the two of us at it. As for me I've been helping out with all the English work.
"Hey guys I was talking to Zain the other day and he said something about a picnic this weekend?" they both look up suddenly from the books and Nas is in the corner chewing her pen, this is the first time I've seen her face properly all day she's doing completely different work to the rest of us and appears to be making more progress.
"Ohh yes ummm" Haley looks around the room for help. I kept quite about this picnic since I seen Zain thinking they might bring it up at some stage but it's meant to be on in two days and nobody has opened their mouths.
"Well it's meant to be a pretty small affair, we didn't think it would be any fun to be honest" Missy says shuffling. I frown, "oh really because that's not how Zain described it", Haley sighs loudly, "Alright alright..we didn't say anything to you because well Jordan will be there and we thought you might find it awkward or something" I figured this is why they didn't tell me but it still makes me feel out out.
"Guys!" I say throwing my hands up in the air, "I know you didn't mean any harm but you can't just shelter me from Jordan forever..we're over and I want to go to this party!"
They smile at this, "Sorry al, we just didn't know how you'd feel about it" Nas says genuinely,
"So that's settled then we'll all go!" Missy exclaims.
"Ammm-"
"Nasreen Paracha if you say one thing about doing more homework tomorrow instead I'll skin ya!" Missy says in a fake Pakistani accent mocking Mrs Paracha. We all burst out laughing on the ground and one of my copy book pages accidentally gets ripped out.

I make myself a hot chocolate going to bed, I never drink it but now and again it's nice. "What's going on with you and Riz?" I ask Haley, across the room. She looks taken aback, but a little smile is on her face. "We're sort of going out.." my eyes widen. "No way!" I say in a hushed whisper. "It only happened properly the other day when I went to his house" she says, I can practically see the butterflies dancing around her stomach.
"What are you going to tell Missy?"
"I don't know..I don't care she'll have to find out sooner or later...I don't know why she's so against it"
"Me neither..I think she just doesn't want you to get hurt" I say leaning on my elbow. "Yeah..yeah"
"Oh and Haley?" I ask, she grunts already drifting to sleep.
"Make sure you be safe and everything okay? Like never do it without protection and if he wants to do something that you don't-.." she cuts across me, "Ali! You don't have to tell me..I know" she mumbles and goes quite.
Not ten minutes later I hear her loud breathing.
I can't sleep, I put Gilmore girls on my phone and watch a few episodes. I used to joke with my mum that we were the English version of Lorelai and Rory, even though Lorelai never went on a drug binge. I haven't completely forgiven my mum but it's nice knowing that she's coming back to her normal self..things are starting to feel different but not everything is a bad different.

"Ali...Ali!"
"Mmm"
"Ali wake up! What's that sound?!".
I sit up in bed, I must have fell asleep at some point. I squint my eyes in the darkness, "what sound?" I ask confused.
"Listen!" She hisses and let's everything go quite. There's a tapping. Tap. Tap. Tap.
I roll out of bed sleepily to look out the window. "What are you doing? Don't go near it!"
"Don't be stupid Haley" I mutter.
"Call Missy instead!"
I take no notice of her and pull the curtain back to peep out.
"It's just a cat..there's one jumping around on the bins...go back to sleep" I mumble.
I hop back into bed and pull the covers up above my head. When I hear Haley's heavy breathing once again, I slowly as possible stick my legs out and tiptoe out of bed. I hear Haley's blanket shuffle and stop dead clenching my teeth. When I'm sure she's fast asleep again I gingerly open the bedroom door, careful not to push it to far to when I know the creak could ruin everything.
My eyes haven't adjusted to the dark yet, so I feel my way down and stairs and out the door.
It's freezing outside even though I'm still wearing my fluffy Pajamas! Yes I'm wearing fluffy Christmas Pajamas and it's April..don't judge me. I wrap my arms around me and make my way outside the gate.
I don't know what's going on here, but my brain is still asleep and things feel a bit foggy.

"What the hell are you doing?!" I hiss into the dark. He stops looking up at the bedroom window and jumps.
"I wanted to talk to ya" he says into the darkness. I can barely make out his face in the dark so I step closer feeling my toes frozen to the ground. I look down and realise I'm not wearing any socks.
"Oh yes because I forgot you couldn't just do it in the daytime like a normal person!" I say indignantly.
"Forget it" he mutters and starts to walk away.
"Hey! Get back here" I shout as loud as I can, keeping in mind every house around me is a deep slumber. I jog up to catch him, noting that he's fully dressed. "Owww" i wince stepping on a smashed bottle. He turns his head and frowns I can see he's considering not coming back. "Oh piss off" I say when he grabs me by the arm.
"What are you even doing here for gods sake!?" I say hopping over to the curb to sit down. He sits down beside me with a sigh. My foot is bleeding slightly and I press down on it with my hand. We sit in silence together. "You said you wanted to talk to me" I say rubbing my foot. "You don't want to talk to me" he replies putting his legs straight out in front of him.
"Can you blame me?" I scoff.
"No..." he doesn't meet my eye when he's speaking and it's annoying me.
"But if you feel the need to wake me up in the middle of the night..I suppose you should say what you want before I go back inside".
He stares off for a minute and turns his head back to me, "you remember how I got you that trip to London for Christmas?"
I try to keep my face looking neutral but this is not what I was expecting to come out of his mouth, "um yeah.." I think of the envelope still on my drawer. "I rang the hotel place and they said they'd change it for me", Jordan sounds like a crazy person, why the hell does he feel the need to tell me he was able to get a fucking refund on what was supposed to be one of the best times of my life, I cried for weeks over the midterm when he didn't text me about it, part of me expected him to show up on the door step and whisk me away..he never did.
"Seriously Jordan if that's all you came to say-I step up off the curb,
"Wait" he says holding his arm out. I don't grab it but I sit back down beside him with a sigh.
"I know your pissed at me..and you should be but..."
"But what Jordan? Seriously what the actual cock are you talking about?! You sent me a text...no explanation nothing even happened for gods sake! And then you don't talk to me for WEEKS!" I only stop for air and he hangs his head.
"Jesus Christ you're fucking insane!" I exclaim.
I'm breathing heavily and when he doesn't answer we fall into another silence. I'm mad now and freezing cold.
"What do you want to say?" I ask sounding deflated.
"...I didn't cancel the trip..I just changed it...come with me now?" He says finally meeting my eyes.
I stare at him in shock "you've lost your mind" I conclude.
He almost laughs at this and I could too if this wasn't so bloody bonkers! "Here me out.." he continues "I- sent you that text because..I just- everything felt like shit..Dads been on loads of medication..I- I seen Cory with Naveed and then- when I heard you talking about in the hallway.."
"Jordan! I wasn't gossiping Lara just told me and I was shocked..I don't even care if Cory's gay or whatever.."
"He's not gay" he interrupts me.
"Right well even if he was I wouldn't care..and if you were so bothered by it why didn't you just talk to me?!"
"Nothing felt right...I completely failed my mocks..."
Jordan isn't making any sense to me, he doesn't seem to be in his right mind at all. "Anyway, look I'm so sorry I'm so fucking sorry" he grabs me by the shoulders and he looks as if he's about to cry. I don't know what's going on with him and all I want to do is hold him and never let go but something stops me. I'm still so angry at him, he broke my heart...
"You don't have to forgive me..that's not why I'm here..I just wanted to tell you..I missed you so much you have no idea" he laughs slightly.
I smile weakly and and touch his face gently for a moment.
"So come to London with me..right now..we'll have the time of our lives and then when we come back..you can go back to hatin me but come with me now.."
I can tell he's serious and it both terrifies and excites me madly.
"Jordan..I was so upset- you have no idea how hard this was for me..I had no idea what I had done".
He grabs my hand, "I love you...you don't have to love me back but I love you" he looks into my eyes and I know he means it.
I can't stop myself..I grab his shirt and smash my lips into his. He winces for a second clearly shocked but then his tongue moves freely around my warm mouth, i continue to pull him closer.
When I finally break away my hands are still wrapped around his neck,
"What time are we leaving?" I ask smugly.

Hey! Sorry this is so later than I planned but I wanted to get it right hope you enjoy!
Xx