I effing love you

Part 61

"That thing I had to tell you" Jordan says zipping up his pants,
"I heard" I say softly climbing down off the table,
"You heard?"
"I'm sorry...I was just around the corner and I couldn't help- I stop talking mid sentence, expecting to be shouted at or shut down, instead he just smiles,
"Well then that's the hard part over I guess"
"I guess..." We stay for a minute in a rather Christ like silence.

"This means...." I begin, I don't finish this sentence either,
"I'm happy for you Jordan...this is amazing"
"Well I've not got in yet or anything.."
"I'm sure you will" I say determinedly,
He takes my hand, "We've got tonight"

"Come back to mine" I mumble in Jordan's ear as people begin to file out of the hall,
"Someone's had too much to drink" he laughs,
"What do you mean?" I ask slobbering into his shoulders,
"I mean I'm pretty sure there's no space back at yours" he says laughing,
"Awwwh" I whine,
He wraps my arm securely around my waist and guides me,
"Wrong way" I laugh trying to turn around,
"Right way" he assures me guiding me around to the back of the school way,
The air is unusually cold for the summer and goosebumps rise on my arms making me feel slightly more alert,
"Where are you taking me?"
"Somewhere special" he says kissing my cheek,
"God I can barely see a thing" I say feeling along the wall,
We make out onto the rugby pitch,
I laugh realising where were going, "Maybe I should have brought some different shoes"
"Ah- I mumble in shock when Jordan lifts me up in the air,
"Better?"
"Much better" I say snuggling into his chest, I don't have to stay there very long when he drops down at the back of the rugby dugout,
"Was I too heavy?" I joke adjusting myself on the grass,
"Yes miles too heavy",
I rest my head on his shoulder from the side,
"This is where we were on my second day here" I say thinking back on the day that seems far in my memory now,
"And here you are now on your last day here" he says,
"God last day.." I sigh trying to look around with my adjusted eyes in the dark,
"Always thought I'd be glad to get away from this dump," he says popping the P,
"Now I'm not so sure" he sighs,
"Don't tell me Jordan Wilson is scared" I tease,
He slaps my leg lightly,
"What are you doing?"
"What do you mean?" I wonder,
"You agreed this was your last day here too...so what are you doing?"
I sigh deeply, "I'm trying to decide" I say coming back down to Earth, talking about Jordan's future all seems quite easy but when it comes to myself there's a blur of uncertainty,
"I was going to go to this college...I looked it all up and everything..but then"
"What?"
"My mum....she asked me to come back to Manchester with her.."
Jordan rises at this, "Really..? Are you going to go?"
"I don't know..."
"Suppose I should just make up my mind" I laugh,
"Where's the college..?" He asks, I can hear the sense of hope in his voice,
"London" I answer plainly squashing all of the excitement in the air,
"Oh.."
"What do you think I should do?" I say turning to face him laying on my stomach,
"Do you want to live with your Mum again?"
"Maybe...she does seem to be back to normal and what if I don't go back with her she might-
"I think you should stop worrying about everyone else..what do you want to do?"
I stop for a minute, "Well...I suppose I want to stay with you" I laugh,
"You can if you want"
I raise my eyebrows, "I'm sure you could find a course near and..."
"It's no use is it?" I say plainly,
"No...you'd never be happy" he says,
"I wish we could..."
"Me too.." he answers stroking my hand gently,
A sleepiness falls over us, "Go to London" he says resolutely, causing my eyes to shoot open,
"Yeah?"
"Yeah" he answers, wiggling down so that his head is laying down beside me, he reaches up to my cheek,
"You're beautiful".