I effing love you

Part 7

Waking into school it's lashing rain and I know what you're thinking. Why didn't I get a lift? Well I had a fight with Haley this morning and then everyone starting pissing me off. I look absolutely horrible because I had to rush in the shower and now my hair is still damp and only getting worse.
Looking back I wish I had not been so hormonal about it but it's not like I can run back now. I'm just praying I can get into the bathrooms before running into anyone in the hall, they won't recognise me,my name on the roll call will have to be changed to wet rat.
Most of all I'm worried because this is the first day I'm seeing Jordan since Saturday. He didn't text me since and I'm beginning to worry. I mean I thought we had loads of fun, but what if we didn't what if he didn't like me at all and I just went right up and bloody kissed him and he felt sorry for me and didn't want to pull away.
No, calm down I have bigger fish to fry, it's gsce year and I'm determined to do well so as much as I want to run around and live my best life Maths and English language are staring right down my neck.
I get in and manage to run straight into the toilets.
I'm pulling my fingers aggressive through my hair when I hear talking and noises...
I slowly approach the cubicle and tilt my head around the door.
I gasp.
"Alison??"
"Sorry, I-sorry!" I quickly run out of the toilets and into the corridor.
"Alison, one second come back"
"No it's fine, it's fine sorry I didn't know it was you I just- don't worry about it"
Nas looks at me with pleading eyes.
"Please don't tell anyone"
"I- I won't
"Not Missy, please she wouldn't understand it"
"I'm not sure I understand it"
She makes a pained face and I suddenly feel a pang of guilt.
"Sorry I didn't mean it like that, but I mean her..."
"She's not like you think she is"
"Isn't she one of those England-first racists nas! She's a racist!!"
"Stop shouting", she says hushing me.
"And no Sams not a racist, she isn't , would she be with me if she was?"
"But she's- she's- she's I can't find the words "she's weird"
I instantly regret it, Nas looks so hurt. Her brown eyes fill with tears and she frowns at me.
"Nas...nas I-"
"Forget it, you know out of everyone I thought you might understand"
With that she walked away and I was left there, i don't deserve friends, no wonder I bang on about never having anyone to talk to and then I fuck everything up with the people who actually listen to me.
What a great start to the day.

I numbly walk to all my classes without talking to anyone else all morning. Nas doesn't look at me once in English and Ms Keane says that we're going to be doing a play on Romeo and Juliet, normally I'd be excited I love drama but not even that can take my mind off everything.
I was worried about seeing Jordan this morning after everything that happened but he isn't here. At first I'm too distracted to really notice but when he still hasn't showed up for Computers I'm starting to worry, he hasn't contacted me all weekend and now he's nowhere to be seen? Has something happened?
Suddenly I start to question everything how could I have been so naive, I know Jordan doesn't have the best home life but surely he's okay? Perhaps he just has a cold or something and i don't need him thinking I'm making a fool out of myself. I have to swallow my pride. What if he's not okay? No, stop it surely he is.
"Alison, have you saved your word document on or do I need to say it one more time?"
I come back to earth with a bang and I'm embarrassed when I realise the whole class has completely moved on and are all looking at me.
Alya speaks up without hesitation,
"I know you're new and all but around here we know how to turn computers on and off"
I see red "What's your problem?"
"Ooohhhh" the class jeers as Mr Lamret shushes us.
"Excuse me?" Alya looks me up and down and scrunches up her nose.
"I said what's your problem, you colossal bitch!"
"ALISON GET OUT"! "STRAIGHT TO MISS CARTER NOW!"
I storm out leaving all my notes behind as I go, the class is staring in shock and then start cheering. I look behind me and Alya looks like she's about to burst into flames. I couldn't resist the urge, i look behind and throw both my middle fingers up in the air, and start running down the corridor.
They've got another thing coming if they think I'm sitting in an isolation room for the rest of the week.
So I go.
I run, I run, I keep on running until I'm outside and Ms. Bird is shouting after me along with Mr. Bell who's spotted me on the corridor. I don't stop. I can't stop.
I collapse onto a park bench when I'm sure I'm far enough away and it's then I notice the hot tears running down my face. My nose is running too and I know I must look a state.
I don't know what to do, I can't stay here. I want to go home. Everything is different here.

Hey! I know this is a bit of a comedown chapter and I also know the play they do is not Romeo and Juliet but I just changed it myself! I hope you enjoyed this please let me know and stay tuned I know this was a bit short!
A x