I effing love you

Part 4

Finally the weekend has come, a morning where I should be able to lie in bed for hours without anyone telling me to not be late. At least that's what should be happening instead of being awoken by Missy's hairdryer at nine o'clock.
"Missy what the hell are you doing I was sleeping" some may say I'm being dramatic but I got barely any sleep this week from starting school and just basically starting a whole new life that in this moment I wanted to kill her.
"Oh sorry babes, Aaron and me are going into town" as if like a dog to his owner Aaron put his head into the room "nearly ready Missy?"
"Yeah just coming" i desperately want to be mad at her but I'm afraid Aaron will think I'm a pyschopath.
"So what's all this hanging around Jordan Wilson about then?"
"What"
"You too seem particularly cosy all this week if I remember correctly" Missy' is now smirking.
"We're just friends, he had to show me around the school"
"Oh come on you and I are both fully aware you knew exactly where everything was on the second day" I can't help but grin at her.
"We're just friends Miss, i don't even know the guy a week".
Suddenly her face becomes less playful "yeah well just be careful yeah?"
"Of course Miss, you know me"
She smiles half heartedly I know she wants to say something about both our mums but Aaron's calling and she grabs her signature jacket and rushes off with a "ta-ta"
Missy and I understand each other we both had to grow up before our time, learn how to look after ourselves with nobody else to do it for us.
Haley is still asleep so I go downstairs and make myself some coco pops and scroll through my phone. I'm looking at all the instagram posts from my friends back in Manchester, they don't even seem real to me anymore as i aimlessly like and comment "prettyyy" on each selfie after selfie.
I'm getting bored of my phone but just before I jump in the shower I get a notification "Jordanwilson added you by search" I laugh and send him a chat.
"Searching for me now are we? 😭"
"Don't flatter yourself"
"I'm getting in the shower talk later"
"Is that an invitation?"
"Oh piss off you wish"
"Are you doing anything later?"
"Who wants to know"
"Seriously al, I can't stay in this house all day Dads driving me mad"
"Fine I'll meet you in an hour?"
"Yeah I'll cycle over to yours"
"Bye c you then"
The warm water hits my body and it's like a release of all the tension I've been holding. I sigh as the warm water trickles down my body. I don't think about anything, not Jordan, not my drugged up mum, not Missy or Haley, not about nana dying, nothing.
"ALISON GET OUT OF THE SHOWER HOW LONG DOES IT BLOODY TAKE"
For fuck sake.

I didn't think I'd care about how I looked around Jordan after all I walked into school everyday with my bed head and droopy eyes but this seemed different. He had asked me to come and hang out with him. I felt compelled to make some sort of conscious effort. I finally settle on some denim mom jeans, vans and a white t-shirt with a butterfly, it's basic but cute and not over the top. I try every single hairstyle I know, I hate my hair it's too thick to actually do anything with so I just leave it down and put on some light foundation and mascara. Before checking myself in the mirror approximately forty seven times I run downstairs and wait on the couch. I don't know why I seem to care so much, I'm sure Jordan won't make any effort for me, he's just as bad in school coming in wearing hoodies over his blazer and trainers everywhere.
I rush to the bathroom and as I'm peeing i hear the back door knock.
"Jordan?, what the 'ell are you doing here"
Shit shit shit, Haley has opened the door i rush to get up but manage to knock the loo roll straight into the toilet. I curse myself as I fish it out. Panicking holding the sopping wet piss paper, I can hear Jordan and Haley
"Just wondering if Alison is in"
"What's it to you"  Haley could be a right stroppy cow when she wanted to be and i knew Jordan might simply leave if I didn't show up. As if Gandalf himself was pushing me into walking I open the toilet door and confidently walk out.
"What's that in your hand" haley looks as baffled and confused as Jordan who's just standing there staring at me in disbelief. It's in that exciting and horrifying moment that i realise I still have the drilling toilet paper strung over my fingers.
"I- oh- i- this- I just-" GET IT TOGETHER WOMAN. Haley is giving me no help I make a mental note to hide her contour later. Eventually as the silence gets too much she steps out of her trance and comes to my rescue "oh my homework, I dropped it in the sink thank you for getting it out for me" the attempt is poor especially because she stops before each word thinking about what to say next but I go along with her. "No problem, you know me always here to help!" I cringe, I think I'm going to puke and I know my makeup is not heavy enough to hide my tomato face. I slam the mess into the bin wash my hands and run out the door.
I can tell Jordan is considering going home to his unbearable family or stay with me Alison pissy pants. Will I ever come back from this???