Daddy Issues {Draco Malfoy}

Chapter 30

-= Draco's POV =-

We'll get home to the Malfoy Manor, and you will marry Astoria. I don't want to repeat myself. You'll marry her and that way we can restore the Malfoy name which you damaged.

My father's words keep repeating themselves in my mind. I hate him. I hate him more than anyone in the entire world. If I could I would kill him.
I can't believe my mother would let my father do this. She loves Venus, and she knows I don't want anyone else but her. I'm locked up in my room and my mom puts food in front of my door because I won't leave this room ever again. Not to eat, and definitely not to marry some girl I barely know.
I still can't wrap my head around what really happened. Fuck I can't marry Astoria! I can't marry anyone but her . . .
I know we weren't perfect, but she's the only one I've felt this way for. She brought up parts of me I never knew existed, and in her, I found a love, I no longer believed was real. I promised her, I fucking promised her that I'd keep her safe and that I wouldn't let anything happen to her, and I fucking broke my promise. All I want is her, and I lost her, the only girl I've ever loved, I lost.

A knock on the door gets my attention. "Fuck off!" I yell and bury my head back into my pillow. I can't speak to my parents, I don't want to. ''Please open the door, we need to talk.'' My mother's voice is low. I let out a loud groan, but get up and open the door. I don't meet her eyes and just walk back to my bed. ''I know you won't talk so just listen.'' I pull my knees to my body and bury my head in my hands. ''All your father cares about is the family name, and I'm sorry for that . . . I know you don't want to marry Astoria, I know you'd rather marry Venus, but please, please listen to your father.'' She sighs deeply, and I know she's on my side, but it sure as hell doesn't feel like this right now. Why can't she just get a divorce and disagree with him?
I don't respond and she gets up and leaves my bedroom. By now Venus must've figured out that I'm gone, she'll be crying and hating me . . . maybe it's better if she hates me, maybe that way I won't have to live with her pain too, but maybe I should and maybe I should feel all the pain I've caused her, because I deserve it. I deserve the pain that I'm feeling. The rest of the evening goes by fast, I barely eat the dinner my mother brought me, and I go to sleep early.

Day 1

I don't leave my bedroom again today. All I can think about is her. I don't eat, I barely get out of bed, and all I can do is write down my feelings. I never really wrote down anything, but she once told me that she did, which made me do it too. I want to either bawl my eyes out or hit someone in the face until they start bleeding.
My mother tries the best she can, she leaves food by my door, she tries talking to me, but I just don't want to talk to her, or anyone for that matter.
The only thing keeping me sane is her. Everything about her. Especially the memories and her voice inside of my head, as if she's still with me. I talk to her as if she never left, as if I never left . . .

Day 2

It's a rainy day, and the rain on my window gives me a little hint of peace. I decided to write letters to her, but I won't send them, I know I'm not allowed to be in contact with her anymore. Today is the first letter I'm writing to her. I write to her about how in pain I am, and how all I want is to be with her again. I write about how my father is degrading me every chance he gets, telling me about how I need to man up and ignore my feelings, how I'm being weak, and that I'm a disgrace to the family, but I ignore him. I don't fucking care about his opinion anymore, I don't give a fuck about anyone but her if I'm being honest. All I want is for her to want me back, and we can run away together and live a happy life, but the only place I can get that with her is in my dreams and my imagination, I know it can't happen in real life anymore.
Her voice is the only thing that's keeping me company when I feel as if I'm the loneliest person on this earth. Just having the slight comfort of pretending to talk to her is enough, but It won't last, I'll get sick of not being able to see her.