SHANK- A Maze Runner Fanfiction

Chapter Fifteen

T.W. This chapter contains self harm. Please do not read if you are sensitive to that. 

Update 2/2 tonight!

A/N This chapter is honestly really sad and it's sad because of the contents in this chapter.

I'm not going to say much but just let you read the chapter your self. I am sorry if this makes you cry.

Song: There is no song sad enough to describe the pain I felt in writing this chapter/

Newt's POV

"It makes us nothing more than friends,"

That's what she had said. That's not what she meant though. But that is what she said and she repeated friends twice.

Wow friendzone, how rough. Hmm first time and probably my last if we don't escape this maze. I thought.

I wanted it to be my last because I couldn't imagine myself with anyone other than Annie. Even though I had never seen another girl that I could remember besides Annie and Lindsey.

I wanted to tell her that I can't just be friends with her. I need to be more, but she wanted space and not to rush it. I respect that and her. I respect her and I wasn't going to just push her limits.

I really liked this girl but she was taking me over. She was in my head whenever I tried to think, she was always lingering in the back of my mind somewhere. When I was busy and wasn't thinking of her something would happen and make me think of her. 'What would I have done in that instance if she was around?' These thoughts flooded my brain and I couldn't possibly find a way to make them stop, or leave.

Breath Newt, just breath.

I couldn't take it anymore. I hadn't done it today and I know I shouldn't but the voices inside my head we're telling me too. I told the others I was going for a glass of water and hurried off to the kitchen.

Frypan wasn't in the kitchen and that was perfect because it was hard to get it out of the kitchen. I walked over to the makeshift counter with all the utensils in a small carved out tree trunk as a cup. I shifted through and found the same small knife I always used. There was a small black bandage on my right arm that I pushed down to reveal deep red cuts indented into my skin.

I took the knife in my left hand and placed it on the red cut and pulled. Sharp pain shot through my body and I saw that the cut had reopened at that cut to reveal blood dripping down. It had cut even deeper than before. I grabbed a leaf from outside and cleaned off the knife, replacing it in the carved out cup before grabbing a leaf for myself and dabbing at the intensely bleeding cut. I recovered the cuts with black bandage and pressed it against my skin.

Just another day in the Glade.

A/N It's really sad that in the picture at the beginning of the chapter you can actually see the black bandage on his left arm. His right arm is covering it since his arms are crossed but you can still see it.😥

I am sorry for this chapter but I felt it needed to happen. Again I am very sorry.

Woo hoo, second chapter of the night. I'm not really celebrating becuase I'm still getting over the fact that I just wrote such a sad and relatable chapter.

PLEASE- IMPORTANT NOTE!-

If any of you are going through depression, anxiety or wanting to commit or have self harmed please talk to an adult about it. It is not a joke and it's not a phase it's a real deal and many people die because they don't reach out or people don't reach out to them!

Call these numbers if you need anything:

Suicide and Crisis Hotline: 988

National Suicide Prevention Landline: 1-800-273-8255

If you see anyone struggling or looking like they need help please don't be hesitant to reach out. Again it's a real struggle and people die every day from it.

Do you think there was a song sad enough to describe this chapter?😔 Let me know------------>

Thank you for reading.  Please vote and comment. Don't be a silent reader. 

-K.D.

Word Count: 714

First Updated: 2/10/23- 9:15 PM

Last Updated: 3/4/23- (adding the banner)