A black girl , who suffers from all type of anxiety social , relationship etc). Has to learn how to live with herself but in peace. Mental Health is a constant struggle in life but it's managing it that stops the damage. Family & Friends is step 1.
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**Beep **Beep
Is all I could hear when my eyes flashed open. I couldn't breathe nor talk, and I felt a tube going down my throat. I didn't know where I was at.
I felt helpless. I pressed the button for the nurse to come get me, finally realizing i'm in the hospital, but not knowing why. I looked down to see if my baby was ok, and noticed my stomach was not as round anymore.
I couldn't even freak out because I couldn't move. All I could see was the nurse and doctors running in then pulling the tube from my throat so I can breathe.
"Hi sweetie i'm your nurse Jackie, you had a incident major you are in the hospital, you now have a beautiful baby girl that is upstairs in the nicu , and she's super strong, your boyfriend is with her, I would advice you not to speak right now"She said.
I knodded my head in agreement, already feeling how sore my throat was, so I decided against talking.
"Will you like my to go get your boyfriend"Nurse Jackie said.
I shook my head yes again.
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I saw Messiah big headed ass. Running over to me I wish I could smile right now, but i'm in so much pain.
"Hey Ma, we got a beautiful baby girl she's so pretty"Messiah said showing me a picture.
I could feel the tears coming from my eyes. I ahead so many questions to ask and so much to say but I couldn't.
"I didn't name her, cause I knew you would beat me up if I did that"He said.
I shook my head in agreement.
"The doctors said it's gonna be a long road for you to heal, but where the person stabbed you at didn't inflict much damage on your organs"He said. Sounding all smart and stuff.
I grabbed his hand, and I rubbed it. He gave me a kiss on the forehead.
"Baby, I got this and we gonna get out of this area. Whoever did this gon pay, Zay on it right now"He said.
I wanted to say no it's not worth him going to jail over, but I knew they wouldn't listen anyway.
In my head, I keep thinking why me why do I keep getting hurt. I don't even wanna go out the house anymore after this, let alone Idk who I can trust anymore.
"Your sister, and everyone wants to see you"He said.
I shook my head no, I couldn't deal with all that right now. I just wanted to see my baby.
"Ok bae I understand, you only gonna have to be in here a little bit longer, and soon you should be able to see the baby ok"He said.
"I'm gonna go and spend some time with her now"He said.
I shook my head ok. Knowing I didn't want him to go because I felt alone and so helpless here.
