Her Blue Eyes (GxG) [Completed]

Part 24: The beginning of The storm.

Diana's POV:

"I love you too." My reply came from the bottom of my heart as I continued to struggle internally. I couldn't stop the rush of negative thoughts through my head...

Words are sharper than blades...

They can cut your heart so badly that it would be impossible to stop the bleeding...

Lily apologized to me, but I can't forget the fact that she got scared of me...

I can't forget the fact that she thinks I'm capable of hurting anyone, including her...

I'm not like her dad...
I'm not like him at all...
I'd never lay my hands on her...

I just lost my fucking control for a moment!...

I'm not a saint!...
I'm not perfect!...

How many times should I tell her?!...

I want her to love me just for who I truly am...
Just the way I love her...

But we keep getting back to square one...

I like Lily, but I can't handle her expectations of me...

I feel like I'm suffocating under the burden of trying to act nice and well all the time...

I truly love her, however, this love makes me even more mad whenever I'm upset with her...

Now there is a fear planted inside my gut, telling me she'll lose interest in me eventually...

She'll love me less day by day...

~

As Lily fell asleep in my arms while we were still lying down on the couch after the passionate kiss we had earlier, I got up and slipped my hands underneath her shoulders and knees, lifting her up in bridal style.

I carried her back to the bedroom and tucked her into the bed. I stood there for a few minutes, looking at Lily and Ashley sleeping in my room together. This is so messed up...

I sighed and returned to the living room. As I could no longer sleep, I took out a cigarette and placed it between my lips. I lit it and took a deep inhale. The nicotine hit my bloodstream and I felt a wave of relaxation wash over me as I let the smoke find its way out of my mouth. I leaned back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling.

There is something peaceful about midnight. I smirked bitterly as I got immersed in my thoughts.

***

[Flashback to earlier when Ashley arrived.]

As soon as I heard the doorbell, I sat straight. Then I noticed Ashley rushed to the bedroom and wrapped her arms around my neck, crying. I held Ashley in my arms and stroked her hair, trying to calm her down as I glanced at the doorway.

Lily was standing there, watching us quietly...

I averted my gaze from her when an awkward feeling pinched my heart.

Don't look at me like that, Lily...

Ashley pulled back from my embrace after a few minutes. Her eyes were red from crying, and then she said after a sniffle, "Sam is cheating on me."

My eyes widened in shock. "What? Why would you think like that?"

She pulled out a tissue from the side table and replied, "Sam told me that his ex-girlfriend got hired by the same company as him, and she tried to hit on him again. She said that she had always liked him, but Sam rejected her and told her that he's married now."