Not a Diary ➳ LS

Entry Five

Entry Five:

I'm honestly tired about worrying about all of this shit. Louis doesn't belong to me. I can't control what he does or where he goes or.. Anything, really. I can only remain sane and be a good friend.

After calming down a bit over the past few days, I've realized so much more, not only about my boundaries around Louis' personal life, but about myself.

And I've found I'm a rather interesting person that I never took the time to get to know.

And you are probably thinking,"Oh, Harry. You've gone bonkers." But I assure you I am more sensible then I feel I have ever been in the past.

I've found that there's a lot of things about me I've ignored, neglected. Or maybe never noticed. Whether anyone else has, I can't be sure, but the important thing is that I know. I know now.

A lot of the things I've discovered in the mystery that is myself aren't big changes. For instance, I don't like tacos anymore. Gigantic plot twist, I know. That's okay. I can sit out on Mexican Food Fridays. At those gatherings most people just drink anyway.

Like I said, no biggie.

But there were some things that I've found to be quite life changing. Some things that will change my perspective on the world as I know it.

So, Im going to tell you.

The first one to know.

And as I take this last shaky breath of innocence, before scribbling down the words that seem to threaten my existence, I hope that you won't judge me.

Because, dear journal:

I am gay.

-Harry