Love Letters and Literature

Explanations and Elightenment

I run to my door and rip it open as fast as I can. Standing in my door way is Thomas looking like hell in his navy blue suit. The tie is barely hanging on and his dress shirt is mostly untucked. I also notice one shoe is untied and the other is covered in mud.

"Darling I'm so sorry -"

"Sorry? Where have you been Thomas?" I ask angrily, not letting him come inside.

He looks pained at my outburst, but I don't care. Anger is boiling in my veins as I look at Thomas's dark circles and five o'clock shadow.

"For fucks sake, were you drinking again?" I ask once the smell hits my senses. He hangs his head in shame, and I just throw my hands in the air in defeat.

"Why?!" I yell, pulling Thomas's tie complete off. "And why do you look like you've been mugged?"

"I just thought I'd have one drink when I got home, but as I waited for you and thought of that bastard touching you I drank more. Before I knew it time had flown by and it was time to come over but honestly I could hardly stand."

I roll my eyes as Thomas tells me his aggravating story.

"I think I decided to walk here, but I blacked out. I don't have my phone, wallet, or keys but I don't think... I don't think.."

Suddenly Thomas is pushing past me and running for my bathroom. Once he's there he heaves loudly into the toilet, throwing up what sounds like his entire stomach.

As much as I want to be angry I just can't be. Thomas walked here in a drunken stupor just to see me even though he really should have stayed home. I can punish him for drinking too much but I can't punish him for loving me.

I place my hand in his back and rub it in small circles.

"I'm going to go get my phone and you're going to cancel class, then you're taking a shower." I say and leave the room to get my phone.

When I come back in Thomas is sitting on the bathroom floor with his head in his hands. "Thomas?" I ask once he doesn't lift his head up.

He ignores me, staring daggers at the linoleum.

"Thomas." I repeat more urgently and his head slowly lifts up revealing blood shot wet eyes.

A rogue tear drips down his face and it causes me to suck in a sharp breath. My heart aches and I close the distance between us.

I drop to my knees and wrap my arms around his neck. Thomas buries his head in the nook of my shoulder and squeezes me so tightly I can hardly breathe.

"I don't fucking deserve you, Sophia." Thomas's voice breaks in my ear. I hold him tighter and shake my head. "You're the only one who does." I argue in return.

"There are things about my past that I avoid talking about, but maybe it's best that we do." Thomas says with disdain. "I think that's a good idea. I actually think we should take a trip. E-mail your students then I'll call Fiona."

Thomas tries to question me, but I give him no answers. After he's cancelled his classes for the day I call Fiona and tell her I need to borrow her car.

She obviously agrees, and tells me that she will be over in about an hour so that she can get ready for class before she drops it off.

I turn on the shower for Thomas who is leaning against my sink with his eyes closed. He looks like he's barely managed to brush his teeth without falling over.

I test the water to make sure it isn't too hot then walk over to him and start unbuttoning his dress shirt.

He puts his hand over mine to stop me. "Why are you so forgiving?" He asks me with weary blue eyes. "You've not done anything in need of forgiveness Thomas." I respond, my fingers going back to undoing buttons.