Masterpiece {h.s}

38. Tension & Opinions

*The gif has nothing to do with the chapter but it makes me laugh so hard. If a gif could be a religion I would definitely worship this one.

Harry’s POV

I was freaking out. 

I felt like I was losing control on things that I shouldn’t be, letting Anna slip away from me. Earlier this morning we had a real argument, our first argument, and to say that it was troubling me would be an understatement. We did fight before, when she was too stubborn to let me in, but this morning was different. We were having different opinions on something fundamental in our relationship : my role in her life. 

I couldn’t understand her point of view, how she could ask me to just stand by while she did all the work by herself. I wanted to be there for her, I wanted to take the weight off of her shoulders, not just wait until she was completely pieced back together. As a couple, we should be doing these things together, she shouldn’t just push me away again.

That’s what it always came down to, her pushing me away. But the moment my lips touched hers, I was bonded to her and made a solemn promise to myself that no matter how hard she pushed, I would never let go. I do admit that it can seem a little overboard, but could you really blame me? If you had lived the pain that she indulged me in whenever she wanted nothing to do with me, maybe my reaction wouldn’t seem so overboard. 

In the short time that I’ve known her, she had made me the happiest I’ve ever been, even if at times things weren’t easy, I wouldn’t change these moments. They built our relationship, they made us stronger together. I knew she needed help and I’d be damned if I let her tell me that I don't belong next to her while she works on getting better. 

She accused me of pitying her, but she couldn’t be more wrong. I considered her to be so strong for getting through all she had. She hadn’t even told me everything yet and I was still impressed. What I felt was far from pity, it was admiration. I simply didn’t want to see her get through something like that again, I wanted her to be happy, with me. 

Breakfast was awkward, we were both avoiding a subject we knew was inevitable. Anna barely said a word to me and I haven’t said anything either. She stood on the other side of the counter. Her back to me as she watched the toaster, waiting for her toast to come out. I sighed, hating that she was so close yet so far away. I got up from my seat and headed towards her. She didn’t move as I stood next to her, my body rigid. I was so scared that she would reject me. She eventually looked up, our argument was bothering her too. She looked uncertain, insecure. My hand slowly made its way to her face and I rested my palm against her cheek. My lips carefully pressed against her temple and she closed her eyes. 

“I love you,” I whispered. The words still made my heart skip a beat whenever I said them. “I’m sorry.” 

We both jumped slightly at the sound of the toast being ready. She detached herself from me and my heart broke a little. She was still mad at me. 

She kept her back to me as she put jam on her toast, then turned around to hand me mine. Her eyes avoided me and I crossed my arms over my chest, refusing to take it unless she looked at me. At my denial, she lifted her gaze. 

“Talk to me,” I told her. “I can’t handle you being so silent.”
“What do you want me to say?” she asked with a small voice.
“What you’re thinking about. I can’t just go on with the day knowing that you’re mad at me,” I sighed. “We need to solve this.”
She looked down. “Harry.”
I raised my hand to stop her. “Don’t ‘Harry’ me. We’re facing this.”
“You don’t want to face this right now,” she warned me.
“Why not?”
“Because I am mad and it’s tinting my thoughts,” she said as she handed me my toast again.