The Pact (Sterling U: book 2)

Chapter 7: Savvy

It takes me a few minutes to pull myself together in the bathroom. I tried so hard not to let it get to me. Not to let her get to me but I failed. Miserably. I feel so defeated and embarrassed and I hope to all that is holy that Nate did not notice my frantic state before I left the room. I splash some water on my face before looking at myself in the mirror.

Staring at the girl looking back at me and holding on to every bit of strength I have. I'm not home. I'm not alone. I can't do this here. I take a deep breath, forcing the tears away and swallowing down the coal sized lump in my throat. I look at the girl staring back at me. "You are not her. You will never be her." The tears start to build in my eyes and I angrily swipe them away, growling at my reflection. "Don't listen to people's opinions who won't listen to yours. It doesn't define you. She does not define you." With another deep breath I nod my head and leave the bathroom. The second I enter Nate's room I instinctively know I should have stayed in that bathroom for the rest of the night. "What?" I ask his solemn face. He shifts nervously on the bed and I eye him skeptically. What the fuck is wrong with him?

"Um. Your phone kept going off when you were in the bathroom."

"Ooookay? Is that a problem? I'll put it on silent."

Nate clears his throat as I slowly walk to the bed to grab my phone. "Um. No. It's not that. You...you kind of..." I grab my phone and notice that it was facing up on the bed so he could see everything. I mentally slap myself before my face meets my hand and I growl at myself. "I didn't mean to," he says defensively, "Honest. I really didn't. It just kept going off and it was there and I glanced over."

Another growl, "How much did you see?"

"Enough." I look up and see pity in his eyes. "No. NO! Don't fucking look at me like that."

"Like what?"

I gesture to his face. "Like you're fucking sorry for me. Don't pity me, Nate. You have no idea what's going on. You haven't a clue so don't sit there and act like you know and all sad and shit."

"You're right. I have no idea what's going on but I do know that if my dad ever spoke to me like that I'd probably flip out."

"Well its not your dad so mind your own business."

Nate eyes me, mixed feelings running rampant on his face. He lets out a sigh, "Fine. Do you want to continue the movie?" I close my eyes, debating whether I should stay or not. Don't let her ruin your night. Stay. When I open them I see Nate watching me, silently asking me to stay. I nod, walking to the other side of the bed to get comfortable. "I'm going to need more pizza and maybe a shot or two." Nate looks at me, glancing back and forth between my eyes in an attempt to make sure I'm alright. He nods, "Okay. I'll run downstairs and get something for us." My eyebrow quirks in question. "I'm not going to let you drink alone, Sav. I got you." I nod and then he's off the bed and down the stairs.

I sit back on a sigh. Grabbing my phone, I clench my eyes shut to muster up as much strength as I can before I torture myself and look back at my text messages.

Mother: You're such a worthless piece of shit. Why the fuck did I even have you? You can't even be here to help out your own mother. What kind of a person leaves their poor mother to fend for herself to get things done for Thanksgiving?

Mother: Thank the Lord Jesus that you don't have a boyfriend because that poor man would probably have to beat you to get you to do anything properly. I told you I wanted the plates with the leaves and pumpkins on them. Not the plates with the leaves, pumpkins and TURKEYS! Can you not hear? Are you fucking deaf? Blind?

Mother: Pick up the right ones on your way here tomorrow. Your brother is already here helping me get things ready because you're useless. You're lucky I even invited you here. He said you didn't congratulate him on his wife's pregnancy. What kind of sister does that? A rotten bitch. That's who!

Mother: I should have raised you better. I should have sent you away like everyone told me to. Maybe then you would have proper manners. I didn't raise you to be so horrible to people. You're a horrible human being! No wonder no one ever wants to be with you or around you. You're disgusting.

Mother: Make sure you bring pie tomorrow. Not just for yourself. Bring pie that everyone would want to eat. If you plan to take leftovers bring your own Tupperware because you're not taking mine. You'll just ruin it and I'll never see it again.

Mother: Listen here you little bitch. When I text you I expect a response. I don't give a shit that you think you're all high and mighty now that you go to college. You will answer my text messages and my phone calls! Do you hear me! Or so help me God I will make your life a living hell!

I swallow the lump in my throat and choke back the tears once more. I turn my phone off and throw it to the other side of the bed. Oh God. Nate saw all of those. I breathe through the tears, biting my lip hard to stop the sob that wants to escape me.

Nate walks in, clicks the door shut quietly before locking it and walking slowly over to the bed. He places the shot glasses and a bottle down on the table before sitting on the bed and pulling me into a hug. Everything broke inside of me. My sobs escaped me and I gripped onto his shirt drenching it in my tears. He held me to him, cradling my head with one hand while running his other up and down my back. We collapsed into the pillows, my face burrowing into his neck while he continued to comfort me.

"Shhh, baby, it's okay. I'm right here. I promise, Savvy, I'm not going anywhere." I cried harder at his words but he didn't seem to mind. We lay like that for what felt like hours before my breathing finally calmed. I sat up, wiping my eyes and chuckling sadly under my breath. I looked at Nate who was watching me intently. I shrugged, "Ready for that shot now?" He sat up, wiping my tear stained cheeks before placing a piece of hair behind my ear and tilting my chin up so that my eyes would meet his. "How about we play a game?" I narrowed my eyes at him. "A game?"

He nodded, "Yeah. Something that will help take your mind off of things....somewhat but will also help numb everything." He chuckled and I eyed him suspiciously. "I'm listening."

Nate grabbed the shot glasses. Handing me one he opened the bottle of clear liquid. "Every question you answer you get a shot." My eyes narrow at him, "Mmm, okay. And are you answering these questions too?" Nate laughs filling our shot glasses, "Yes. You ask a question first and if you really don't want to answer then just say the word and I'll give you a second shot and we can move on. But.... you need to remember our rules."

I raise my glass to him, "Mmm. How could I forget. No lying. Everything stays between us. Anything else?" Nate stares deeply into my eyes, "Not yet. But I have a feeling things are about to get interesting." I throw back my shot, my eyes never leaving his, "Me too."