Dance With Me (Niall Horan)

Chapter Forty-Six: What Do I Do?

The words left her mouth and I was left on the floor. Did she just say that? Am I making things up? Am I hearing what I want to hear? How is this possible that this amazing girl in front of me, the most amazing and beautiful girl that I thought I had lost, missed me? I scrambled to my feet, and she stood up to, her back pressed against the wall, unsure of what to do now, and my heart lurched at the tears that still felll down her cheek. I took three steps towards her, my hand going towards her neck and then going towards the back, pulling her towards me, finally giving in to those irresistible lips as I pressed mine to them. The kiss full of need and desperation, I pressed against her harder, she needed to understand that I missed her too, that I love her, and that I don't think it is ever possible to stop loving her. Her hands grasp onto my t-shirt, and I can feel a smile that's forcing its way onto her lips, making me smile with her. When we finally pull away for air, chests rising and falling rapidly, I press my forehead to hers, stroking her cheek with my finger and staring into those beautiful big brown eyes. 

“I’ve wanted to do that all night.” I whisper, grabbing her hand with my other hand, rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. I'm still smiling, grasping onto her hand tighter, I want to remember this forever, remember every kiss, every touch, because her words bring everything crashing back down to reality.

“I’m with Rob.” She whispers back.

“I love you.” I reply, bringing her hand up to my lips and holding eye contact as I press my lips to her hand. “Rob doesn’t matter, if we’re in love that’s all that matters.”

“I think I love him too.” She whispers, and in a flash I drop her hand, moving away from her and kicking the wall. How can she love him? They’ve been together for 3 months! That’s too soon! She hardly knows him! He hasn’t met her family like I have, he doesn’t understand her like I do, he doesn’t love her like I do. “Niall.” She whispers, but I kick the wall again, feeling pain rush up my leg from the pain, but it doesn't numb the pain tht she causes me inside. I feel as if I'm dyin, my whole world dying yet again. For that one moment, it felt like we could be together, that nothing would matter at all, but that's not the case, and I felt like I was losing her all over again. “Niall.” She cries again, and I can see that tears are falling down her cheek again.

“Be with me.” I whisper, wiping the tear from her eye. “Be with me. I’ll never hurt you again, I love you. Please, I’m begging you.” Lennox looks down to her hands that she is wringing and I clasp my hands over them, and she moves her eyes to look back up to me. “No one can ever love you as much as I do.” I whisper, pressing my forehead against hers. “No one.”

“Niall.” She whispers, her voice sounding raspy.

“I know you love me, you loved me before, it can’t just go away in a few months.” My hands go to her jumper. “We got our names on our hips because we loved each other, because we knew we wanted to be together forever.” I have an urge to see my name, the relationship seeming like a faded memory, it’s hard to think of a time when I could call Lennox mine. I pull upwards, and Lennox’s hand immediately grabs mine, pulling it back down, her face filled with dread and panic, making me want to see the tattoo even more. I tug upwards, but I see no ink, only pale skin. A sob comes out, and I put my hand to my mouth, why would she get rid of it? It was a promise, a sign of commitment. It was our love. 

How could see her fair pale skin, hurt so much. How could she rid herself of my name on her hip so easily? When I think I'd rather die than get rid of it, I want everyone to know and remember forever that I love her, that I'll never stop loving her, and the tattoo shows that. But not anymore, now it shows of my unrequited love. 

“Niall.” Her voice comes out and it causes pain to my heart, raising my hand to silence her, facing my back to her.

All this time, I’ve been sat just thinking of her, loving her, wanting her, what has she done? She’s being with another guy, removed my name from her hip, everything she does shows exactly of what she’s told me. She hasn’t missed me at all. She just doesn’t care. She’s doing it to make me feel better, make me feel like I stand a chance.