Expired With Me

Chapter Thirty-Five

Iris

I lay against Jonas' chest, waiting for Colton. He rubs his thumb over the back of my palm, and my heart aches by the second. Colton is going to ask to speak to Vienna. I know he is. He drugged and kidnapped me to France once upon a time just to see her, and that's when they weren't even together. Now they're married. Jonas kisses the top of my head.

"Are you going to tell him?" He asks. I close my eyes.

"What do you mean?" He leans his head against the pillow.

"You have a horrible poker face."

"I don't like lying to people I care about."

"Then stop, my love. Tell me where she is." I take a deep breath, nestling further into his warmth. He plays with a lock of my hair.

"I was going for the same book, Jonas. I was raised to kill you. What if it was me he shot? I can't help but feel responsible."

"Your uncle threatened your life. You didn't choose to become a rebel. She did. I know you see yourself in her, I do too, but..." A knock on the door stops him, but not without a sigh. "Go. Please, be careful." He lets go of me, letting me stand.

"I will. I love you, Jonas."

"I love you too." I open the door, then slip out into the hall with Colton, making sure to be just loud enough so Jonas can hear, but not so loud that Colton can tell what I'm doing. I'm done lying to the man I love, but I'm still not on his side.

"I'm not telling you," I say to Colton. His eyes widen.

"How did you..."

"Really?" He sighs.

"Can I at least talk to her. It doesn't have to be in person. Please." I take a deep breath.

"I'll talk it over with A. Don't get your hopes up."

"Thank you." I nod, reaching for the door handle. "Iris?"

"Yeah?"

"I owe you."

"I know." I close and lock the door, then crawl back into bed with Jonas. "How much did you hear?" I ask. He wraps his arms around me, and I nestle back into him. I'm home.

"Enough. Does Brydan know?" I shake my head.

"Only as much as Colton, I promise."

"I believe you." He stays silent for a minute. "What do you think of the name Estella?" I turn to face him.

"You think the baby's a girl?" His face drops.

"I hope so. I don't think I'm ready for a son." I let him hold me again.

"Why not?"

"I am Preeminence, as was my father, and grandfather. So on until the beginning of the Society. Our child must not know my Date. They won't know that their uncle was supposed to be in my position, that they were never to exist. How am I supposed to explain how I gave it up?" I attempt to raise an eyebrow at Jonas. "Besides for you." He kisses my forehead. I smile.

"Estella, huh?"

"I have other names, of course."

"How many?"

"Nine girls, four boys."

"How many do you plan on using?" Jonas lowers his voice.

"As many as you'd like."