Something Great.

Chapter 24 - Like Forever

Today is the last day of school for me, tomorrow is my surgery.

But of the few months that I've been waiting for my surgery, this week is the time I finally tell my teachers, but hopefully they got a memo. I told my first period teacher and got exactly what I didn't want and the reason why I didn't want to tell anybody, I got pity. I just don't like the attention.

"Oh I hope you get better soon!"

"That's terrible! You're so tough!"

"Wow! I hope you come back to school soon!"

I just didn't want to hear it. Those teachers didn't mean it. They didn't give two shits. They won't even remember I'm gone, and frankly, I don't give two shits about them either. The only teacher I like is my science teacher, Mrs. Brooks. Everyone else hated her, but she was nice to me, she understood, she helped me. 

When I told her she said, "Wow Ellie, after something like that I wouldn't even consider coming back to school, that sounds like hell." 

I just scoffed and smiled, "Yeah well I'll be fine, it's a break away from here, because honestly, this place IS the hell."

She laughed, "Try being a teacher, I don't even know why I signed up for this damn job, you're one of the only students I like, and that's a VERY small amount."

I laughed, "Well thanks, you're the only teacher I like, you're one of the only few people I'll miss, all these other teachers have bullshit apologies and your comment is the only one that doesn't make me want to slam my head against a brick wall."

"You're welcome Ellie, and I don't mean this in a bullshit way, but I really do hope you'll be okay."

"I appreciate it." I smiled, I really would miss her. Even though science wasn't a strong point, she made it easy for me. 

I went to my next class, talking to Riley

"Oh my god I miss you already! It'll feel like forever when you're gone!"

"Riley, I'll be gone for a couple months, and you can visit me as much as you want, goodness what's up with my friends not wanting to visit me in the hospital?"

"It's because we always see you as this ray of sunshine, so seeing you in pain like that would kill us."

"Seeing my friends would help me so much."

"I know, and I'll try to visit you, it just depends if my mother decides to get off her ass and do something for me for once."

"I understand." Riley always tells me stories about her mother being so harsh to her, I wish she could come live with me, to get away from that. 

We talked for the rest of the period until I had to go to the last period of the day, which for me is math. My least favorite subject, and my least favorite teacher. 

Of course I told her, so of course, she acted like she cared.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry, that's terrible! I hope everything turns out okay!" 

I faked a smile and said thanks, then went back to my seat.

I couldn't wait for this day to be over. Tomorrow there won't be any school, and after that will be spring break, and being in the hospital is exactly how I'm going to spend it. 

The dismissal bell rang and I rushed to my bus, avoiding any contact with Liam, he might say something, he might fake apologize, he might say he'll visit, he might actually visit, he might forget. Most likely he'll forget, and and hopefully this surgery will replace the pain in my chest to pain in my back. It sounds promising.

I just want to get this over with already.

I noticed him walk behind me, he's probably going to be on my bus, going to his grandma's. Whatever though, I won't be seeing him for a long time. 

I sit by Grace and don't even look up as he walks up the aisle, he's most likely going to sit all the way in the back, but he doesn't, he sits in the seat right in front of ours. Was he really trying to make this hard for me? I mean he's Grace's friend so he could sit there to talk to her, but couldn't he just sit somewhere else. 

Grace notices I'm uneasy, so she whispers our conversation, "Are you okay?'

"Yeah I'll be fine, soon I'll be away from all this." I point to him.

She nods, I'll miss my bus buddy.

We laugh the rest of the way, I know what she's trying to do, calm me down, trying to settle my nerves. It's working, I really need a laugh right now.

I get up, preparing to get off the bus, and Liam gestures for Grace and I to go in front of him, I smile slightly at the ground and walk forward.

I say bye to Grace and start to walk the opposite direction. I hear Liam say bye to me. I'm not going to be rude, "Bye Liam."

I'm saying it more like, "bye Liam, I won't be seeing you for a couple months, and you might've forgotten about my surgery, but I don't care."

I walk off, but look behind me, Liam and Grace are talking. I hope she doesn't remind him about my surgery, if he forgets then that's his problem. 

I step through my front door, no one's home. I know my family is taking me out to eat for a big dinner tonight because I have to go a while without eating, so they thought I should be filled up for that.

I sit on the sofa, recollecting all the facts I know about this surgery, I'm not nervous, I'm not scared, but it all just suddenly hit me like a bus, EVERYTHING hit me. I can't stop crying, I feel defenseless, alone. I am alone right now, no one to hold me and sway me back and forth, reassure me that everything will be okay. I only have myself and I can't reassure myself everything will turn out perfectly, I just feel like anything that could go bad, will happen.

I quickly push myself back into reality, the chances of anything bad happening, are VERY slim.

For the first time in a long time, all four of us are together, my dad, mom, Jen, and I. We went to a chinese buffet, so I'm able to get as much food as I desire, I do get a lot of food, but for some reason I can't get it all down, and my dad notices. 

"Honey, why aren't you eating a lot, is it because of nerves?"

"I honestly don't know, I would like to eat this whole establishment, but I'm just so full, maybe it is nerves, but I don't even feel nervous, I'm fine."

They all shrug and continue eating, and I'm trying, It's very annoying, I'd like to enjoy my last meal before tomorrow comes but I can't. 

We come home and from this point on I cannot eat anymore. Which is perfectly okay with me. 

Both of my parents are staying at the house tonight, but my dad is sleeping on the couch. It's a little strange but it's for me so I guess it's understandable. 

I talk to them for a bit aboout my surgery, they settle my nerves a little, and tell me when we're leaving the house, my surgery is scheduled for 9 tomorrow morning so we're gonna leave around 6 because I have x-rays and cat scans to get out the way before my surgery. So they suggest I go to bed, and I take up the offer. 

I settle in bed, trying to sleep away the thoughts.

I fall asleep, hoping maybe he wouldn't forget. 

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okay aorry it may suck bc it's just a filler before the surgery, which will be a major of course, do you guys think Liam will remember her visit or forget?

okay anyway please keep reading and voting, also please comment and share if you really like it

okay i love you all thanks!