[Part T] 8. Sorry.

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[You really did that?] Yeosang was eating breakfast with Seonghwa on a Tuesday morning, right before class.

[We both did, I think.] Seonghwa explained. [But now he doesn't talk to me, do you think I did something wrong?]

Yeosang shook his head, he knew it wasn't going to be easy. He observed how his friend looked at Hongjoong, how he spent time with him and smiled sweetly even when he wasn't feeling well. But he also knew where Hongjoong grew up, the older had told him, Jongho also shared their experience with him.

Both tend to talk about how fun it was when they were kids, but the rest knew something was off, the rest new there was a deep hole in both boys hearts, a hole that needed to be filled with love and care. At least that's what Mingi explained to Yeosang one night they were texting at 5 am.

Mingi explained how lost Jongho was when he met him. His dad was a teacher and his mom died when he was just 11 from an overdose. He acted so toughly and fake... Mingi had to force himself little by little and try to fill the void.

Hongjoong was different. He covered his problems with smiles or jokes, being sarcastic or escaping out of reality. His hole was still empty, but not as empty as when they met.

His friend Seonghwa on the other hand... He was bright and hollow... The feeling was so strange.
He had like millions of staircases on his mind, some lead to nowhere, others to happiness and others to sadness.

While Hongjoong had sad times, Seonghwa had happy ones. Yeosang couldn't explain it clearly with words.

[I think he's just confused. I mean, you already knew you liked him but he must feel strange. Also, Jongho has told me not so pleasant stories about one of his friends coming out as a lesbian and her parents beating them up.] Yeosang tried to not make Seonghwa feel guilty.

[Really?! He never told me about that... He's always smiling and being annoying around me.] The older felt left out.

[I think he just doesn't want you to feel sorry for him, or bad... Maybe he believed telling you those stories would make you fear of him.]
If Yeosang was good at something, it was turning others worried thoughts into logical explanations.

If someone came to him saying their partner spend a whole night in a hotel with another person, he could come up with sixty other ideas of why that could've happened, just to help others to not overthink.

[Okay, it makes sense...] The order dropped his head. Something felt sad but he decided to just eat his breakfast.

-

San, Mingi, Wooyoung and Yunho were all at the Park, it was Friday afternoon and the rest of his friends were not planning on coming over.

"No! They have been ignoring us for a whole week! What did we do?" Mingi exclaimed.

"You literally stole Seonghwa's diary," San explained leaning on his hands, munching on a lollipop.

"What did WE do though?" Wooyoung asked.

"I think it's because you tried to get Hongjoong drunk on new year's eve," Yunho recalled.

"Ah, yeah, that." Was all Wooyoung said.

"But why doesn't he drink?" It was San who asked now.

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