𝙏𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙚𝙣𝙙~ 𝘼 𝙅𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙋𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙖 𝙛𝙖𝙣𝙛𝙞𝙘

~ 𝘔𝘺 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 ~

Sophia's POV:

After that conversation on text I couldn't hold myself together. He made me realise what 4 years would do to me, to him ....to us.

I knew from the second he texted me that I should have asked him about Uni so much earlier I regret it so much. This is why I promised myself not to get into a relationship before uni because it would destroy my relationship.

In 4 years time we would be 2 different people I mean hell we might even be in different relationships and it stung thinking about him with another girl but that's how life goes we keep moving on and we eventually forget.

I know for a fact that I would never forget what me and him have we have something special weather we are in a relationship or not we have somethig no other girl would have with him. I will always know him better...Always.

Even if always meant the next 4 years or a whole eternity watching him pass by with a different girl, every Christmas every new years eve and every 'family' holiday.

My heart was broken, and its stupid because its not like we just broke up...it was a simple fight right ? No matter how much I told myself it was just a fight the voices in my head told me otherwise. 

I needed to get my applications sent in so without another word or thought I quickly forgot about Jackson and for the time being focused on my work. 

Jackson's POV:

I know her and I know me...She is probably crying and I am overthinking. I didn't want her to cry but a relationship does not work when the people in it want different things. She's set on Notre Dame and I'm set on NYU. See there different. 

I thought about the 4 years ahead of us and I knew she wouldn't move on quickly because she's not one to rush into relationships. But I am...and that's the problem. While I'll be happy she will always be watching always standing by as I move on. Let's face it we would always be back for Christmas or 'family' gatherings. I curse at myself as to why I didn't mention that. It meant more time to see each other which was good but she won't want to talk... not like this... not now.

Sophia's POV:

𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝘀𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 (https://soundcloud.com/billieeilish/bored ) 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗱.

𝗧𝗪: 𝗚𝗘𝗧 𝗬𝗢 𝗧𝗜𝗦𝗦𝗨𝗘𝗦 𝗢𝗨𝗧 !!𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝘆𝗲𝘀 𝗜 𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗹𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗰𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗼𝗯𝘃𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗼𝘄𝗻𝗲𝗿- 𝗕𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗲 𝗘𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗵.

𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝘀𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘀 𝗦𝗢 𝗠𝗨𝗖𝗛 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 !!!

*SEND*and then there was that *swoosh* that meant my email had gone and drifted away to its receiver. My fate sealed.

After I pushed my computer out of the way I slumped on my bed and lay there thinking through everything.

My life was a disaster it was a matter of weeks before my acceptance letter would come back. And It was a matter of weeks before I would need to leave my boyfriend and my family and every second of my childhood behind.

I began to cry into my pillow as  I played back my memories in my head.

...

After crying for a good 40 minutes my head was buzzing and I had a huge headache. A wave of dizziness hit me as I got up. I stumbled to the bathroom clumsily and threw up.

After I was done I walked over to the sink and washed my face with cold water.

... wait for chorus 

" I'm not afraid anymore what make's you sure your all I need?" I sobbed. "forget about it".

"When you walk out the door and leave me torn your teaching me...to live without it..." I cried.

I ran out my room, down the stairs and out on the streets. It was raining but I didn't care.

I ran as far as my legs could take me until they gave in. My legs buckled under me and I felt as my body hit with the concreate floor.

I lay there and stared as rain drops hit my face. My clothes were soaked and my hair was dripping wet.

His voice  "I love you bubi....I'll never give up on us" playing on repeat in my head.

He was all I needed at the moment the one thing I gave up on because I ran away and avoided my problems he was right I was afraid but I couldn't be anymore...

...

"I'm not afraid anymore" I screamed. "Your all I need" I cried as I held myself. I lay soaking wet not a single care in the world.

... let song get back to verse.

*Flashback* 

Sophia laughing. Jackson and Sophia hugging in bed watching a movie both laughing and hugging and having a good time. Them running away from a teacher as they skip lessons together. Sophia's POV watching Jackson hit the wheel to the rhythm of there favourite song him laughing and then looking over at her smiling. *End of Flashback*

"I'm not afraid anymore what makes you sure your all I need? Forget about" ... "when you walk out the door and leave me torn your teaching me...to live without it"