Lone Wolf || bxb

Chapter 37

I ended up having to go to the toilet a lot that night from all the water that Finn kept making me drink. He ended up having to help me pee because I had a hard time with the zipper of my cargos, with not having full control of my hands, and I didn't have any underwear on, because I had given them to Finn earlier to cover himself with, so I couldn't just keep my trousers off.

It was a little awkward having go pee with him in the room too. I did ask him to just wait outside after helping me get my zipper undone, but he said he didn't want anything to happen to me somehow so he wasn't going to leave. I asked him what could possibly happen if he left me alone in the bathroom for a moment and he said that I could slip and fall and hit my head on the side really hard and bleed to death. His dramatics made me huff and a little chuckled escaped past my lips which made him smile which only made me smile too. I loved him, and nothing could ever change that.

By midday the next day, the wolfsbane was finally fully out of my system and the doctor told me that I could return home now as my vitals were all back to normal.

A lot of people came to visit me, even pack members I hadn't met before, and the week went by in kind of a haze. Alpha Brudus had explained that he didn't think there was a traitor in our midst. He had questioned a lot of people and he trusted his pack members. I felt very bad about the whole ordeal because many people were hurt because of me. Luckily, no one had died though as only wolfsbane darts were used so no serious injuries occurred.

I mourned for my brother like I promised myself I would. I played all his favourite songs that I could remember from when we were kids, I made his favourite foods to eat, and watched his favourite movies. Even though I had known he had been dead for a long time, there was always a part of me that maybe hoped somehow he could be redeemed because his body was still on this earthly plain of existence. But it was Luca's soul that had made him the amazing brother I had come to adore, and his soul was no more so I should have mourned him a long time ago.

It was sad though. Saying goodbye to Luca in all these little ways. I hoped his old soul was up there in the heavens with our parents now, drinking sweet honey from the rivers that flow through the Moon Goddess' gardens.

Finn gave me a lot of space during this time. So did everyone.

Everyone by this point knew everything that had happened, so they knew that I was all that was left of my family. But I tried not to view it all in a bad light like I had done so with all the other times I had lost someone in my life. I may be the last of my family, but there was still a future awaiting me and I could start a family of my own. And then suddenly, I started to feel happier as the days went on.

I started thinking of me and Finn with a few kids of our own and I dreamt of giving them all the things that I had lost. I thought of teaching my kids how to always be there for each other in good and healthy ways, and I knew I would teach them how to stay strong if anything ever happened to either of their dads. I thought about having a little girl and telling her all about her amazing grandma, and having a two little boys who I could teach to be the closest of brothers and to protect their sister and love the stars just as much as my father did.

I smiled at the thought and as I felt Finn wrap his arms around me in the garden, where I was stood watching the sky at these beautiful little birds that flew among the trees.

"You look happy..." Finn commented.

"I was just thinking about things, happy things," I replied. This is what would happen with me as I got closer to the end of my week of mourning. I thought of sad thoughts and then forced myself to think of happy things to lift my mood. I had already lost so much of my life to grief, I'll be damned if I lost anymore.