Retrocognition

74 | falling

Zach's hand in mine is warm and comforting, grounding me to reality in the surrealist of ways.

Merely having him by side lifts my spirits tremendously, removing everything except for this moment in time from my mind. It is when I am with Zach that I feel the safest, as if I am far away from any sort of harm. Furthermore, he somehow manages to make me happy after all of the hurt I've had to endure over these past few weeks. Merely being in his presence fills my chest with warmth and constantly makes me smile.

I don't know what I'd been expecting my first date with Zach to be like, though I can easily admit that I'm pleasantly surprised with the way it has turned out so far. Zach has taken me off campus for the night, picking me up with my favorite iced coffee in hand. The gesture had warmed my heart immediately, leaving me weak in the knees in the best of ways. When we end up in a downtown area in the next town over, I can't deny that I'm pleased. Zach seems to be able to read me well, somehow knowing that I wouldn't want to go out and do anything over the top. Instead, he takes me for a stroll amongst cobblestones, where the two of us walk hand in hand, window shopping beneath strings of pretty lights strung up above us that are being used as decoration lining the streets.

"How'd you know this is what I had in mind?" I question Zach teasingly, gesturing to the area around us as we walk at a slow pace, squeezing his hand in mine.

Zach peers down at me, wearing a soft smile. "Because I know you, Tatum," he retorts with a simple shrug. "Besides, I don't mind taking things slow. I want to do things right with you."

I'm grinning like a devil as I hold Zach's stare, sidling closer to him as I murmur, "I don't know that I would say we've taken things very slow."

Zach's cheeks tinge a faint shade of pink as the meaning behind my words registers in his brain, no doubt thinking back to the night we shared together what now feels like forever ago. I can't help giggling, as he is cute when he's flustered.

"I just don't want to lose you," Zach admits after a moment, risking a glance down at me. "I really like you, Blythe."

This time, it is my turn to walk with flaming cheeks. I bite down on my lip as I eye Zach, shyly admitting, "I like you too. But you don't have to worry about losing me. I'm not going anywhere."

Zach and I round the corner as we reach the end of the street, turning onto a much more secluded and dimly lit sidewalk. Something about the privacy this street offers feels somewhat intimate, leaving me feeling as if Zach and I are the only people around for miles. I like the thought of being completely alone with him; to have the ability to act however I may please and do whatever I may want.

Zach suddenly comes to a stop by my side, turning me to face him by grasping both of my hands in his, running his thumbs in soothing patterns over my knuckles. He stares down at me with those piercing green eyes of his, penetrating my soul and my heart all at the same time. I'm certain he has no idea just how much control he has over me. At this moment, I know that I would do anything Zach asked of me. At this moment, I am all his; my heart beats solely for him.

"I think part of me fell for you the moment I met you," Zach admits, taking me off guard with his revelation. I suppose I hadn't been expecting him to be so serious at the moment. He still manages to leave me breathless all the same. "I've never seen anything as beautiful as you, Blythe Tatum. The first time I looked into those big blue eyes of yours, I felt drawn to you in a way I can't explain. And that's when I knew that I couldn't just sit by and watch you be thrown in harm's way. That's why I tried to stay close to you, to be there for you even when you didn't know that I was. But more than that, I've never met anyone as smart or as strong as you, Blythe. It's like the word fear isn't even in your vocabulary. Ever since I met you, I've constantly wished that I could be more like you. Every second I spend with you, I can't help wishing for more. I think . . . I think I'm falling for you, Blythe."

My vision blurs with forthcoming tears that I desperately try to blink back. The last thing I want to do right now is become an emotional wreck and ruin the tender moment Zach has created by crying. I think Zach's confession is one of the sweetest, most thoughtful and loving things anyone has ever shared with me, which tugs on my heart strings a little.

After being with Jacob and enduring all of his twisted mind games, I suppose a part of me felt as if I'd never fully be able to trust anyone again. And yet I trust Zach wholeheartedly, certain that I have started to fall in love with him. He withholds all of the qualities Jacob lacked, helping to replace the tainted memories I have with Jacob by allowing me to remake memories with him to hold in their place. Whether he knows it or not, Zach is helping to heal the wounds of my past by doing nothing more than loving me the way that he does. I don't think I'll ever be able to truly thank him for all he has done for me in the short amount of time we have known each other. Part of me knows that I will be eternally grateful to Zachary d'Angelo. And I wouldn't mind spending a lifetime with him by my side, waking up every day trying to show him just how much he means to me. He will forever hold one of the most special places in my heart.

"I think I'm falling for you too, Zachary," I whisper, staring up at him with wide eyes. "In fact, I think I already fell for you. A while ago. Now I'm just falling harder."

Zach smiles down at me, wrapping his lithe arms around my waist. He pulls my body in close to his, leaning forward to level his mouth with my ear. I can feel his breath warm against my neck as he whispers in a lilting tone, "Good to know, Tatum."

And then his lips are on mine, taking my breath away in the best way imaginable. Zach takes full advantage of the privacy this street offers as he backs me into the brick wall behind us, kissing me roughly as his hands roam my body gently, his touch full of nothing but love and tenderness.

I smile up at him as our kiss breaks, looping my arms around his neck as I hold his stare. And though I know that nothing lasts forever, I find myself certain that what I have found with Zach will come pretty damn close.