Two Can Play At This Game (A Harry Styles Love Story)(Completed)

-Chapter10

Harry's P.O.V

Does this mean she doesn’t hate me now? That she forgives me for everything? That she will stop and talk to me in the hallway and actually acknowledge my presence? I hope so. Seeing Liberty like this, in such pain, seeing her cry, I want to do something to help her, but I can't do anything except be there for her. What if she didn’t actually want me to stay with her because it is me but because I was the only person in her view? I'm not going to ask her, she needs her rest. I can feel Liberty's breathe on my neck, it’s tickling me a little bit, and the pit of my stomach is warming up.  The bruises, I mean one or two bruise yes I can understand, but they are literally covering her body. There isn’t on bit of Liberty's body that doesn’t have a bruise and I'm pretty sure of it.

Last night, when I saw her and Zayn kissing, my heart sank, I didn’t even realise all the bruises and cuts all over Liberty and now I feel bad. I got in a strop because they kissed but I wasn’t there for Liberty and prove that I am still the old me. Then when I got home at 3am this morning after spending the night with some blonde haired girl called Lucy, the boys went mental at me. I told Zayn and the boys my plan about taking Liberty to the cornfield and they all egged me on and said it was a good idea. But the fact I left her is the reason why she got hurt and I know that is the reason and I know it is my entire fault. So that means that the old Harry has gone even further in Liberty's eyes now, which means that she probably hates me even more.

I got really annoyed with Zayn because he kissed Liberty, he knew my plan, he helped me out, and he knows how much I want Liberty to like me for the new me and not the old one. Yet he goes and kisses her?! Using that against Zayn apparently made me even more selfish because I was being too pig headed to realise that Liberty getting hurt is my fault. But now when I think about it, it is my fault.

Liberty's been out cold sleeping for four hours now, at least she is resting, and hopefully when she wakes up she will be in less pain. I hope she is anyway.  When I saw her on the bed in Liam’s arms this morning, seeing her cry, seeing her in Zayn's clothes, it sort of made me realise that I have actually lost her. It’s made me realise that I am actually lying to myself and I have been for two years.

I remember when Liberty use to wear my clothes, and she use to let me hold her whilst she slept. But seeing her in Liam’s arms made everything weird. Then seeing Liberty cry, it made me realise that I made her cry, I made her heart shatter into a million pieces, I am the one who as changed her. I mean I can't use the excuse that Liberty changed me because she didn’t, management told me I had to make myself have the bad boy, flirty image and it was important for the band. I know I changed whilst Liberty and I were dating, and then I changed even more after we stopped dating, and now here we are two years later and I'm still the dickhead bad boy.

Now I'm known as the boy that has one night stands, gets drunk at house parties, doesn’t care what people think about me. Yes you could say all of it is true about me, I mean I have just proved I have one night stands and get drunk at parties last night.  But one thing that isn’t true is the bit where ‘I don't care what anyone thinks about me’ because I care what Liberty thinks of me, and I care what my family and my friend think about me, and I care what the fans think of me. I have always been the sort of person who can take criticism but I can't take it when people say ‘I hate you’ for no reason, I have to know why they hate me. But that have always been the way I am

Liberty is starting to stir and wake up, her fingers and loosening around my fingers but I'm not going to let go of them. When I think back to it, I kissed her nose and temple, I’ve held her in my arms, I’ve wiped away her tears and I'm holding her hand and she hasn’t rejected any of it. I think she is just vulnerable because if I done this any other time she would kill me.